WEBVTT

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Not Quite Right features discussions that
are unfiltered and uncensored,

5c80b672-a919-4c72-9597-48ca590211d5-1
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and may include themes that are
inappropriate for younger listeners.

c0b26e4c-4beb-4229-b1fa-a592eaf5615c-0
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Also, I swear a lot.

587dcbaa-335a-4833-b8cf-8e1116191c63-0
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Something doesn't seem quite right.

a3802724-77b6-47f2-925c-e182e196d3b0-0
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Welcome to Not Quite Right.

05d07a50-0ed9-47f2-ba6e-02ef602b478d-0
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My name's Ed and I'm Amanda,
and welcome to the 5th and final

05d07a50-0ed9-47f2-ba6e-02ef602b478d-1
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Daredevil for the April 2026 round of the
Not Quite Right Prize for Flash Fiction.

57f860ec-4bf6-49db-a2f5-a3d5df5b3281-0
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And so Daredevils are those who have
signed up on purpose for the dubious

57f860ec-4bf6-49db-a2f5-a3d5df5b3281-1
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honour of having this story read out on
the podcast and getting punished for it.

3f1bbc2a-6fb0-4757-85d3-6bb11246e619-0
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I mean, why do that to yourself?

7557d63e-7c05-4489-92bf-102d61b8975a-0
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So we will read the story and we'll talk
about the story.

56fd8bf4-c6c1-47b4-9755-a3505f36178f-0
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We'll share our thoughts and hopefully
all learn something in the process.

70b98c98-64d4-4f98-851a-3a7a0ff76e43-0
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And today's very brave daredevil is Maria
Sol Becker.

8a4afea3-3c0e-48c1-b4f7-1c349f409651-0
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And it's her first time not only as a
daredevil,

8a4afea3-3c0e-48c1-b4f7-1c349f409651-1
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but her very first time entering the not
quite right prize,

8a4afea3-3c0e-48c1-b4f7-1c349f409651-2
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which boggles my mind that all these
daredevils just raw dog in it.

be20191e-e834-4ec0-b278-576c4691769c-0
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Yeah,
straight to the daredevil situation like

be20191e-e834-4ec0-b278-576c4691769c-1
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that is pure unadulterated masochism
right there.

724914ec-451c-455d-98b0-9be0ebe5aded-0
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No one trying straight into the main
course.

65d9bf95-e1b2-4a4f-bcca-244e53a5bee2-0
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No one knows Bush, nothing of that nature.

df422226-505d-4d48-b220-dd6e69b28423-0
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But we respect that and hopefully we can
match your energy.

897fdccc-e918-48eb-a7c0-b9d8e36a2129-0
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And Maria has chosen to write for Team Ed
this round,

897fdccc-e918-48eb-a7c0-b9d8e36a2129-1
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which I'm very appreciative of Maria.

4d11cc54-c5ed-4c9b-9d2b-5f714e2739f3-0
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Unfortunately, we didn't win,
but we did try.

441af948-33c2-46d1-9e19-f3287e9a1447-0
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If only it was the trying that counted.

626505b3-ae1c-4468-888a-272da53f2c80-0
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Finally was.

0ab7c6aa-b3e8-41bd-9a4a-b085a28ce9d5-0
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And my prompts this round were the word
disco, the action of freaking out,

0ab7c6aa-b3e8-41bd-9a4a-b085a28ce9d5-1
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And my kicker prompt was that you had to
incorporate a disco dance move into the

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story prominently.

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And apologies in advance for this reading.

e5cf6524-a2ab-4780-96b1-a165a15a624a-0
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There's a fair bit of Spanish here,
and I don't know if I'll pronounce it

e5cf6524-a2ab-4780-96b1-a165a15a624a-1
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correctly, but I'll do my best.

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I'll help you.

df79bd1d-5a7a-4d39-a09f-610b2b63bc76-0
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I'll **** in and correct you as you go.

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It'll be great.

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Gracias then other.

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So without further ado,
here is the grammar does the rest by

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Maria Solbeka.

93d43dc2-649b-460b-a4d7-0d20f40d9fac-0
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All week once she has been turning
himself in the sun.

e95eaafd-6807-404a-b94a-820024e0baae-0
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By Saturday,
Gualagua Chu smells of sunscreen,

e95eaafd-6807-404a-b94a-820024e0baae-1
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hot concrete, frying oil and nerves.

c16218a7-daa1-44f1-85d4-3bcd9608df6f-0
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Mary Mary opens tonight.

bbc51ff4-65c3-4f8c-bf7b-46f108ff2309-0
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By noon.

a4375a5f-f58d-451d-897a-edbdb8615a9e-0
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Nico is in the patio with the razor and
the bowl of warm water.

7ccf98e0-ae83-40f2-a649-72f6ae6d9a1d-0
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Seven years of Saturdays like this one.

56592f7b-f02d-436d-b123-21c9bd579092-0
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She watches his thigh go smooth under
Nico's hand,

56592f7b-f02d-436d-b123-21c9bd579092-1
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the water turning cloudy with soap and
small black hairs.

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Niko's mouth,
when it reaches the inside of the knee,

0bb87a9b-cef9-46f1-877a-9ebe992c5e04-1
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does not stop to ask a baho tambien.

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The tiles burn.

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The Portenios will be arriving soon,
sunglasses still on,

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as if they had invented looking afterward.

779b1803-c257-42b3-8081-2c5dcd7bd530-0
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The oil, the old baby oil bottle,
grated carrot floating inside like fish

779b1803-c257-42b3-8081-2c5dcd7bd530-1
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flesh, warm in Nico's palms,
warmer down the spine into the small of

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the back,
and the inner thighs with a feather belt

779b1803-c257-42b3-8081-2c5dcd7bd530-3
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will leave its Welt.

70455bf2-9050-4846-93f3-b216d88e41e9-0
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His hands have never hesitated.

40295402-251c-407a-994b-e0ba3a1124a6-0
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Not four years ago when he took one chi
to buy the first dress.

7eb36bc4-6ecc-4b1d-ae6f-ec992424388b-0
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Not last Tuesday when he stole feathers
from Julieta's locker for Millie before

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anyone had asked why.

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Salimos Los dos juntitos, Nico says.

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Como siempre nosos seloso, Nico laughs.

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Mari Mari yasabe akin Mira.

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He runs his palm flat down the spine.

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One more time, Linda.

8745676e-fa88-4435-a672-12951d38e593-0
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She turns.

189407da-ea20-4bc9-9f46-096b4fc47260-0
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The grammar does the rest.

d4b32109-1dff-4191-9045-ed2e2651b678-0
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Backstage smells of Hairspray and vomit.

6492d644-6062-4fbb-a522-bf688c4070b5-0
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Kulieta,
last year's Reyna body built for stones

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and almost nothing else,
is freaking out in a plastic chair,

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mascara running,
a boy holding back her hair.

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Niko glances once.

bc65effd-eafe-4680-a000-093ac700e781-0
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Sinosalea Salemili.

92dd944e-7520-4488-beb3-e40c3b04c302-0
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Nobody argues.

7d344213-8372-469e-92ea-5d5c63414e7c-0
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The stones are already on.

5238acd8-0388-4b42-85ab-4a605620d237-0
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The feathers are already up.

fedd0ae5-4720-4c43-90eb-eeb009fa45f2-0
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Nico fixes one last plume,
already in his own costume, blue and gold,

fedd0ae5-4720-4c43-90eb-eeb009fa45f2-1
00:06:04.483 --> 00:06:07.160
his float after hers.

a4c8f2d3-fe30-4963-b488-4e72703092f3-0
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The third Carossa lurches,
a disco on wheels, silver mirrored,

a4c8f2d3-fe30-4963-b488-4e72703092f3-1
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obscene.

254c98c6-9d27-4e3e-b9b3-9e9b2b6579f8-0
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The speakers boom Mari Mari amaneser
prometido,

254c98c6-9d27-4e3e-b9b3-9e9b2b6579f8-1
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and the drums come up through the wheels
into the soles of her feet.

c5fc383c-cbc6-4880-9a2c-1e61336973c9-0
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She's moving before she decides to Hips,
shoulders, one arm up, finger to the sky,

c5fc383c-cbc6-4880-9a2c-1e61336973c9-1
00:06:50.803 --> 00:07:01.594
sweat running down between her shoulder
blades when Niko's thumbs had been an

c5fc383c-cbc6-4880-9a2c-1e61336973c9-2
00:07:01.594 --> 00:07:02.840
hour ago.

58534c18-a70c-44c4-ab31-96f840b0f901-0
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A mirrored panel catches her, enormous,
silvered, curved like a second sky,

58534c18-a70c-44c4-ab31-96f840b0f901-1
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And for the first time,
she's not Niko's Millie.

843ec51d-f313-4829-80cd-e0525a1a59cd-0
00:07:25.320 --> 00:07:34.938
Not Huanchi's Millie,
but the Millie the club built this float

843ec51d-f313-4829-80cd-e0525a1a59cd-1
00:07:34.938 --> 00:07:46.236
to frame Her finger slows, lands,
points at the girl in the mirror like a

843ec51d-f313-4829-80cd-e0525a1a59cd-2
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deer.

d5e386da-b2c8-4230-b7d3-afb61c7f0b3d-0
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The crowd reads it as choreography.

ae0414e3-7be3-4f1e-92ed-3e6080dca096-0
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She keeps dancing.

cb8053f5-b77c-4729-bc48-62fd063ef868-0
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The float curves.

7eaa02ee-ca04-4a39-aa26-7dbe2a0a74e1-0
00:08:03.280 --> 00:08:12.523
The next Carosa is coming the other way,
blue and gold, and Nico is on it,

7eaa02ee-ca04-4a39-aa26-7dbe2a0a74e1-1
00:08:12.523 --> 00:08:21.027
shoulders oiled, feathers up,
finding her across the runway with the

7eaa02ee-ca04-4a39-aa26-7dbe2a0a74e1-2
00:08:21.027 --> 00:08:26.080
same finger she has just used on herself.

0d6b7ecb-90b1-41ed-a03d-2b7f12288088-0
00:08:29.760 --> 00:08:30.800
He points at her.

fb615fe5-8a93-483b-8bfe-feac63152c41-0
00:08:32.280 --> 00:08:33.240
She points back.

348c89ea-6f0c-4e31-807b-4dd22ccb2364-0
00:08:35.120 --> 00:08:42.674
Two men in feathers in a town that has
been practising this since before either

348c89ea-6f0c-4e31-807b-4dd22ccb2364-1
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of them was born.

aa73f615-8ea7-43f1-8e86-8953c1124c59-0
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The crowd screams.

5eb66980-b1a5-4b5d-a583-11d06398974f-0
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The drums do.

e4fbabd7-3ecc-45f5-bc09-b8a86b7b4893-0
00:09:21.080 --> 00:09:21.200
The.

0dfc540e-9cdb-4932-8085-55d684bf585e-0
00:09:52.600 --> 00:09:57.310
So Gracias Maria for your story and Maria
has left to say voicemail,

0dfc540e-9cdb-4932-8085-55d684bf585e-1
00:09:57.310 --> 00:09:58.880
which we will play now.

ec8d78ee-6c57-4c23-9795-e511c1c0d894-0
00:10:02.240 --> 00:10:06.192
Hello Ed Hello Amanda,
this is Saul Maria Solbecker,

ec8d78ee-6c57-4c23-9795-e511c1c0d894-1
00:10:06.192 --> 00:10:11.785
Argentinian away from home on assignment,
first time not quite right price

ec8d78ee-6c57-4c23-9795-e511c1c0d894-2
00:10:11.785 --> 00:10:12.679
participant.

45f2a483-94c4-4ca9-83dc-b9f44d9d8b9f-0
00:10:13.120 --> 00:10:16.400
So I had a dog once named Disco.

b82d08a8-bc5c-4ac1-935f-0b1f8e038ab7-0
00:10:16.480 --> 00:10:21.910
I was a plough in Afghanistan with the UN
and my boss was a DJ who used to play

b82d08a8-bc5c-4ac1-935f-0b1f8e038ab7-1
00:10:21.910 --> 00:10:23.200
Disco for the team.

cec9b579-28fc-487a-b760-4a7e46361040-0
00:10:23.400 --> 00:10:28.320
So that was the reason for picking team
Ed Nothing personal Amanda.

c22f110a-34c9-4236-b554-cf6e2954165b-0
00:10:29.200 --> 00:10:33.760
So I spent most of those 60 hours dancing
in my kitchen,

c22f110a-34c9-4236-b554-cf6e2954165b-1
00:10:33.760 --> 00:10:39.200
working through YouTube tutorials of
every disco move I could find.

10887cd0-d089-4522-8a76-4d21515b7298-0
00:10:39.760 --> 00:10:41.280
Embodiment is called.

3658efe6-ec17-45d2-aa5f-49fbe917780e-0
00:10:41.800 --> 00:10:44.440
So the story is set in the carnival of my
hometown.

0713e73a-6a56-4435-82f7-d0ea81ad0d31-0
00:10:44.440 --> 00:10:45.200
Well away, too.

64759422-c15b-483d-92b2-3c0df4bd9167-0
00:10:45.200 --> 00:10:49.021
And now I'm seriously considering
pitching it to one of the comparison

64759422-c15b-483d-92b2-3c0df4bd9167-1
00:10:49.021 --> 00:10:49.560
directors.

a0871a1e-e780-4b20-97ad-defcc32ade39-0
00:10:49.560 --> 00:10:50.800
Let's see what they say.

e8acd6b7-a51e-48ed-9503-f017ac46c376-0
00:10:51.720 --> 00:10:53.866
Listen,
one thing I really would like to have

e8acd6b7-a51e-48ed-9503-f017ac46c376-1
00:10:53.866 --> 00:10:55.640
your opinion is on the use of Spanish.

79bd3baa-1994-464b-9387-923a9c638798-0
00:10:55.800 --> 00:10:59.934
I hesitated the way through,
but the stripping the Spanish out of the

79bd3baa-1994-464b-9387-923a9c638798-1
00:10:59.934 --> 00:11:02.120
story felt like a stripping its soul.

35e279a0-8a20-41b4-8873-39205e36211a-0
00:11:02.360 --> 00:11:07.529
So I'd love to know whether it landed or
whether it created more friction than it

35e279a0-8a20-41b4-8873-39205e36211a-1
00:11:07.529 --> 00:11:08.160
was worth.

dc9c343e-23c0-4b52-8d54-daee0ffde18e-0
00:11:08.840 --> 00:11:09.720
Be brutal.

ac71a818-72f3-4e75-8612-2fd1db2ba86a-0
00:11:10.520 --> 00:11:11.240
Thank you.

ff429f2f-ac25-42b8-b33e-b7567aa309d6-0
00:11:13.120 --> 00:11:14.000
Thank you for your message.

0e99611a-da97-4102-bdc0-8d148275c622-0
00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:17.680
And you refer to yourself as Sol there,
So we'll call you Sol as well.

c90f962c-3e8f-48ae-a10c-bb8cb568fd07-0
00:11:17.880 --> 00:11:19.160
And some good questions.

b264f5c4-273a-4467-b6dd-cd7d8209563c-0
00:11:19.280 --> 00:11:21.320
I think we've got a lot to talk about in
unpacking this story.

4ead9000-8f58-4057-9f94-db4ab979dee5-0
00:11:21.320 --> 00:11:22.920
He's a very dense story.

8b75b2bd-219a-4df6-9acb-2b84b09ed19c-0
00:11:23.200 --> 00:11:25.160
So let's get into it.

cbf02e37-03ce-4652-96be-9045f2d2e023-0
00:11:25.160 --> 00:11:28.200
And maybe do we want to start with the
Spanish?

8af6496b-48a4-4bcd-8a1e-cac8c51d24f8-0
00:11:28.280 --> 00:11:28.840
Yeah, sure.

245d8aca-b5ad-40c3-838b-b7b7472bb61e-0
00:11:28.840 --> 00:11:31.734
I mean,
Sol brought that up in her questions

245d8aca-b5ad-40c3-838b-b7b7472bb61e-1
00:11:31.734 --> 00:11:32.120
there.

a73b6ab3-802f-4a3c-9a10-1e9ba5498c5f-0
00:11:32.120 --> 00:11:33.360
And I love Spanish.

8b1947bc-9b35-4b01-b0ea-89eaeeda81da-0
00:11:33.360 --> 00:11:36.520
I know a little bit of Spanish,
but this was still beyond me.

bd301a9e-33de-4ed8-92bb-c2a289c21db4-0
00:11:36.520 --> 00:11:37.040
I will say.

f099bdaf-55d6-4efc-9e0b-b5da2c6ed9c3-0
00:11:37.040 --> 00:11:39.720
Like, I got words here and there,
but I didn't get everything.

8825a0fc-aa97-4164-aac0-ae79650a4488-0
00:11:39.840 --> 00:11:41.400
And I got the gist, I have to say.

e2ea8d38-4e4d-43a7-b3f0-67bffd79ddf6-0
00:11:41.760 --> 00:11:44.640
But Sol has,
Did it create too much friction?

051ae14d-7222-4361-8426-8cbbf50d29dd-0
00:11:44.640 --> 00:11:45.920
Like more than it was worth?

9f881408-f78a-4e48-8e89-bac2c760e908-0
00:11:45.920 --> 00:11:50.561
I do understand this idea of it feeling
like it's stripping out the soul of the

9f881408-f78a-4e48-8e89-bac2c760e908-1
00:11:50.561 --> 00:11:52.360
story to take out that Spanish.

0b19641e-8a99-45cf-b722-3b1dc8bb5fc6-0
00:11:52.360 --> 00:11:56.649
And it is kind of essential here just to
set the scene as well and the tone of the

0b19641e-8a99-45cf-b722-3b1dc8bb5fc6-1
00:11:56.649 --> 00:11:56.960
story.

a6c9ee71-e3af-4e3e-8eed-ae331619a1c7-0
00:11:57.280 --> 00:12:00.585
But I will say that for me,
even as someone who loves Spanish and

a6c9ee71-e3af-4e3e-8eed-ae331619a1c7-1
00:12:00.585 --> 00:12:03.640
knows a little bit of Spanish,
it was still, yeah, friction.

423c9613-ce2e-4f3d-a637-6e81a5541363-0
00:12:03.720 --> 00:12:07.200
It was tricky and did Take Me Out of the
story a little bit.

04501ffa-5e66-48c5-820a-30e478e0722a-0
00:12:07.200 --> 00:12:09.000
Now, that's OK in a way.

eaff31ff-34de-4ab3-a5a2-8567dd322b6d-0
00:12:09.000 --> 00:12:12.344
Like if I was in this scene and people
were speaking Spanish in front of me,

eaff31ff-34de-4ab3-a5a2-8567dd322b6d-1
00:12:12.344 --> 00:12:14.560
I'm not going to pick up every word that
they say.

527012f4-b7ca-4f78-a8dc-9e813b7ad284-0
00:12:14.560 --> 00:12:15.320
And that's OK.

64329c0c-a803-455a-a901-072caba809de-0
00:12:15.720 --> 00:12:20.887
But I do think there are ways to keep the
Spanish as well while also still allowing

64329c0c-a803-455a-a901-072caba809de-1
00:12:20.887 --> 00:12:24.209
like taking the reader along with that
and, you know,

64329c0c-a803-455a-a901-072caba809de-2
00:12:24.209 --> 00:12:29.253
a tiny little bit more hand holding just
to allow that tone to come in while also

64329c0c-a803-455a-a901-072caba809de-3
00:12:29.253 --> 00:12:32.760
allowing us to understand what's
happening at all times.

5fe38b22-59f1-47de-b880-2a28ca52d8cb-0
00:12:32.840 --> 00:12:34.600
Well, look, I'm not a Spanish speaker.

eb5173bf-21e8-4ae6-a31c-7e6d0c9583bc-0
00:12:34.600 --> 00:12:35.960
I have studied some Italian.

10cb9b61-5685-48eb-bf0f-e9eeb1ea55e9-0
00:12:35.960 --> 00:12:39.880
So a few of the words were familiar and
some of them actually I read incorrectly

10cb9b61-5685-48eb-bf0f-e9eeb1ea55e9-1
00:12:39.880 --> 00:12:41.720
because of my knowledge of of Italian.

ccea6568-2dcd-4f05-bc85-6df8c7c06c43-0
00:12:42.280 --> 00:12:47.011
But I do really like the use of Spanish
in this story and I think it gives it a

ccea6568-2dcd-4f05-bc85-6df8c7c06c43-1
00:12:47.011 --> 00:12:49.200
flavour that it would lose otherwise.

a8142305-7a61-46de-84b9-1a5b4217bada-0
00:12:49.200 --> 00:12:50.240
So I agree with that.

5b75611a-f938-4c06-a048-6ae9aa265472-0
00:12:50.640 --> 00:12:55.761
I have read stories and books that
featured a language that I didn't speak

5b75611a-f938-4c06-a048-6ae9aa265472-1
00:12:55.761 --> 00:12:57.400
as well in the dialogue.

7c49c63b-7214-44be-a169-a87400a1b9a2-0
00:12:57.680 --> 00:13:02.503
And I think often the key is making sure
that the context of the sentence explains

7c49c63b-7214-44be-a169-a87400a1b9a2-1
00:13:02.503 --> 00:13:06.978
to the reader or gives enough the reader
enough information to follow what's

7c49c63b-7214-44be-a169-a87400a1b9a2-2
00:13:06.978 --> 00:13:09.884
happening,
even if you don't know the exact words

7c49c63b-7214-44be-a169-a87400a1b9a2-3
00:13:09.884 --> 00:13:10.640
being spoken.

779978d1-a6ad-40de-a41e-5aaa10787760-0
00:13:10.960 --> 00:13:14.655
And I think in this case,
there were a lot of critical pieces of

779978d1-a6ad-40de-a41e-5aaa10787760-1
00:13:14.655 --> 00:13:19.146
dialogue that you really did need to
follow and understand what the characters

779978d1-a6ad-40de-a41e-5aaa10787760-2
00:13:19.146 --> 00:13:22.160
were saying in order to follow along with
the story.

f79e9586-6574-4ae3-b75b-9bdf37ca5933-0
00:13:22.240 --> 00:13:22.560
Yeah.

e549eeeb-570a-4845-b8da-ba9006c5cda8-0
00:13:22.560 --> 00:13:26.356
And I think you'll see in some stories
where you might have a mix of English and

e549eeeb-570a-4845-b8da-ba9006c5cda8-1
00:13:26.356 --> 00:13:29.308
Spanish, for example,
and you know where you need the clarity,

e549eeeb-570a-4845-b8da-ba9006c5cda8-2
00:13:29.308 --> 00:13:33.057
you might have the English and then you
would add the Spanish like kind of as a

e549eeeb-570a-4845-b8da-ba9006c5cda8-3
00:13:33.057 --> 00:13:35.120
full stop on the end of that kind of
thing.

e1608832-3622-46c1-8ecb-549399d1f116-0
00:13:35.120 --> 00:13:36.920
And that that's one way of doing it.

db6b38ce-22eb-4f28-9e77-d6c3c34ddf7d-0
00:13:37.240 --> 00:13:41.581
But I think for example, OK,
so we have this moment in the beginning,

db6b38ce-22eb-4f28-9e77-d6c3c34ddf7d-1
00:13:41.581 --> 00:13:46.543
Nikko's mouth when it reaches the inside
of the knee does not stop to ask abajo

db6b38ce-22eb-4f28-9e77-d6c3c34ddf7d-2
00:13:46.543 --> 00:13:47.040
tambien.

78185d76-dffb-4ad3-a612-6dc3228d4f6a-0
00:13:47.480 --> 00:13:50.812
I think you could have a little bit more
clarity what he means then,

78185d76-dffb-4ad3-a612-6dc3228d4f6a-1
00:13:50.812 --> 00:13:54.772
which is like below as well or whatever,
And just that little bit of hand holding

78185d76-dffb-4ad3-a612-6dc3228d4f6a-2
00:13:54.772 --> 00:13:56.560
so that it's very clear at all times.

670a7e6f-f157-4d2b-b56c-5f2e3a18e558-0
00:13:56.560 --> 00:14:00.147
And I think this is not just a language
issue,

670a7e6f-f157-4d2b-b56c-5f2e3a18e558-1
00:14:00.147 --> 00:14:05.720
but a common issue to flash fiction in
general, which is clarity, right?

5db521fe-3532-4279-8f77-004fcb4a11b8-0
00:14:05.720 --> 00:14:09.760
How much clarity versus how much poetry
and lyricism do you have?

da5af4b4-8e2f-4a57-94e3-44854f4da420-0
00:14:10.280 --> 00:14:13.560
And I think both have their place in
flash fiction.

31e27e90-1252-4cab-aeba-18d30e096a4c-0
00:14:13.560 --> 00:14:17.088
And some stories warrant more
straightforward language and others

31e27e90-1252-4cab-aeba-18d30e096a4c-1
00:14:17.088 --> 00:14:19.440
warrant more poetic language kind of
thing.

2faa3042-4189-475e-8561-2fc7167bf6e6-0
00:14:19.440 --> 00:14:23.928
But we always need to have enough clarity
to understand at all times what's going

2faa3042-4189-475e-8561-2fc7167bf6e6-1
00:14:23.928 --> 00:14:26.336
on,
otherwise we can't fully appreciate the

2faa3042-4189-475e-8561-2fc7167bf6e6-2
00:14:26.336 --> 00:14:27.760
story and watch it unfold.

a860ea38-4e6b-4919-ba92-a6c418c70e75-0
00:14:27.760 --> 00:14:30.576
So yeah,
I think there are options for keeping it

a860ea38-4e6b-4919-ba92-a6c418c70e75-1
00:14:30.576 --> 00:14:33.280
while also taking us along and making it
clear.

67fde663-9bf6-486c-8fd4-e37fbab77c0a-0
00:14:33.520 --> 00:14:34.040
Absolutely.

821f215f-ff81-47ce-9859-e36160298dc7-0
00:14:34.040 --> 00:14:37.905
But I do respect the decision to keep the
Spanish in there,

821f215f-ff81-47ce-9859-e36160298dc7-1
00:14:37.905 --> 00:14:40.160
and I think it does help the story.

e89f75cf-59d7-4878-a405-c02dbc791cbe-0
00:14:40.160 --> 00:14:41.280
It is just about clarity.

bb49e988-7234-4e9a-8023-77582a7b1c12-0
00:14:41.720 --> 00:14:46.400
And I mean, to add on to that,
it is quite a complex story in other ways.

5c5c3a9f-90f4-4427-b54f-cc0028062c31-0
00:14:46.800 --> 00:14:50.840
There are some gender changes that happen
along the way and some name changes.

eba3c875-552b-43b7-9f08-decc1026fb54-0
00:14:51.240 --> 00:14:55.560
So I think even if written in English,
it would also require close reading.

b7e1b8dc-29da-43ea-98bd-3390c530c898-0
00:14:56.080 --> 00:14:59.440
So it just is another layer on top of
that that is a little bit difficult for a

b7e1b8dc-29da-43ea-98bd-3390c530c898-1
00:14:59.440 --> 00:15:01.120
reader, especially a non Spanish native.

c2ef37fe-ded8-4628-9534-6acf94cf123d-0
00:15:01.160 --> 00:15:06.023
And I would probably say that as an
overarching statement that friction in

c2ef37fe-ded8-4628-9534-6acf94cf123d-1
00:15:06.023 --> 00:15:09.720
voter commas is probably the main issue
with this story.

946ad62a-0363-4d16-b535-873b8343b295-0
00:15:09.720 --> 00:15:13.080
Now all the judges who read this story
voted it maybe plus,

946ad62a-0363-4d16-b535-873b8343b295-1
00:15:13.080 --> 00:15:16.944
which means that it was strongly
considered for the long list and it

946ad62a-0363-4d16-b535-873b8343b295-2
00:15:16.944 --> 00:15:18.400
didn't make the long list.

65908118-b016-4b46-8cc1-cea53917251c-0
00:15:18.760 --> 00:15:25.320
And the reason being that there was just
too much that was left confusing or left

65908118-b016-4b46-8cc1-cea53917251c-1
00:15:25.320 --> 00:15:27.720
unclarified for us as readers.

97fc863a-9907-4120-864d-fef3483511ca-0
00:15:27.720 --> 00:15:32.441
And so while we all loved the vibe of it,
and then the Spanish was part of that

97fc863a-9907-4120-864d-fef3483511ca-1
00:15:32.441 --> 00:15:35.923
vibe at the end,
there was just too many questions that we

97fc863a-9907-4120-864d-fef3483511ca-2
00:15:35.923 --> 00:15:36.160
had.

efb4affe-406f-4a40-8f1f-bb3f01136635-0
00:15:36.160 --> 00:15:38.747
And we,
we felt like we were outside of this

efb4affe-406f-4a40-8f1f-bb3f01136635-1
00:15:38.747 --> 00:15:41.680
story and not really ever fully connected
with it.

330c05db-c316-4536-91f0-a36a077497e0-0
00:15:42.120 --> 00:15:45.018
And honestly,
I think had there been that bit more hand

330c05db-c316-4536-91f0-a36a077497e0-1
00:15:45.018 --> 00:15:48.280
holding throughout,
it probably would have made the long list.

b73a5c5b-cf3c-4840-ba48-88cbf5e3c863-0
00:15:48.280 --> 00:15:50.440
Because as a vibe, it's really strong.

b9f014e8-105e-4891-b844-d7606c5f7d56-0
00:15:50.560 --> 00:15:50.840
Yeah.

5824cd79-bb2c-4012-8240-3a00de826df4-0
00:15:50.840 --> 00:15:53.929
And I,
I want to really make sure that we state

5824cd79-bb2c-4012-8240-3a00de826df4-1
00:15:53.929 --> 00:15:58.884
that this is a a really well written
story and it's filled with great lines,

5824cd79-bb2c-4012-8240-3a00de826df4-2
00:15:58.884 --> 00:16:03.325
great visual imagery and a lot of
subtlety that comes through in the

5824cd79-bb2c-4012-8240-3a00de826df4-3
00:16:03.325 --> 00:16:03.840
writing.

c6434e6a-04f3-4cd4-8688-210d18c22601-0
00:16:04.520 --> 00:16:05.760
And it's a great experience to read.

6b21ede2-4683-46cf-89ae-0d56f09c81d4-0
00:16:05.760 --> 00:16:09.680
It's just that it is difficult to follow
exactly what is taking place.

201bcf09-ca5b-4cfd-8828-3cbf8ff260cc-0
00:16:10.040 --> 00:16:10.360
Yeah.

cffa6992-84da-4423-8a9a-d1c407dace83-0
00:16:10.360 --> 00:16:14.840
And look, I was reading it and Googling,
you know, the Spanish was part of it.

385b254d-d969-4bad-ac76-af1775b9f285-0
00:16:14.840 --> 00:16:17.750
But as you said,
it wasn't just the Spanish that created

385b254d-d969-4bad-ac76-af1775b9f285-1
00:16:17.750 --> 00:16:18.720
the clarity issues.

faa694ac-4b06-4e81-95df-e1033eee566e-0
00:16:19.120 --> 00:16:24.242
I think because we've got this story
about drag Queens in a parade,

faa694ac-4b06-4e81-95df-e1033eee566e-1
00:16:24.242 --> 00:16:28.160
the transition from Huanchi to Milli was
not clear.

17dbf449-18e3-4deb-bead-cd48d8f743be-0
00:16:28.160 --> 00:16:31.560
We sort of just have a new name stated as
if it's another character.

cb879474-03ce-4c70-abbf-c69905eeeec6-0
00:16:31.560 --> 00:16:35.760
And as I'm reading this for the first
time, to me, Millie was another character.

595b38cb-d702-497b-bf61-2b7721dc0a1f-0
00:16:35.960 --> 00:16:39.610
So Millie's first mentioned,
I believe in the line not last Tuesday

595b38cb-d702-497b-bf61-2b7721dc0a1f-1
00:16:39.610 --> 00:16:43.905
when he stole feathers from Julieta's
locker for Millie before anyone had asked

595b38cb-d702-497b-bf61-2b7721dc0a1f-2
00:16:43.905 --> 00:16:44.119
why.

cce3d104-9853-470f-8730-70e83bb83656-0
00:16:44.680 --> 00:16:47.416
So to me,
we've got Julieta then and then Millie as

cce3d104-9853-470f-8730-70e83bb83656-1
00:16:47.416 --> 00:16:47.680
well.

1095881e-ea31-4d25-a9ea-61430a295478-0
00:16:47.680 --> 00:16:51.560
And it's like as if 2 new characters had
been added to the story.

b91cd160-2798-452a-976a-a9b11b100f09-0
00:16:51.880 --> 00:16:54.840
We later figure out that Millie is in
fact,

b91cd160-2798-452a-976a-a9b11b100f09-1
00:16:54.840 --> 00:16:57.600
I guess the drag queen persona of Hunchy.

c0d1f9d4-d6ae-4d4d-8573-900ddcb2b89a-0
00:16:58.000 --> 00:17:02.120
But at that moment when that name's first
introduced, that is not clear.

f3848965-cdb4-4375-9327-e6ef2d86086b-0
00:17:02.840 --> 00:17:03.800
And so we miss it.

f6c8a508-6fdb-434a-aa6e-5c2166fdc628-0
00:17:03.800 --> 00:17:07.920
We don't understand that Nico's stealing
the feathers for Hunchy.

acbbcc03-a589-4749-bb14-d445cdc69b66-0
00:17:08.240 --> 00:17:11.200
We think it's another character again,
so yeah.

ceadb021-32d0-4ba4-9244-dc4eb9986bb3-0
00:17:11.200 --> 00:17:13.760
And that that sort of clarity issue
flowed through.

2395d177-caf7-40de-aedd-81485c537336-0
00:17:13.760 --> 00:17:18.132
Like it just feels like multiple
different characters being introduced

2395d177-caf7-40de-aedd-81485c537336-1
00:17:18.132 --> 00:17:23.121
when in fact it's really just the 2 main
characters with Julieta on the side who

2395d177-caf7-40de-aedd-81485c537336-2
00:17:23.121 --> 00:17:25.400
is sick and so can't fulfil her role.

8e891b65-cd76-4c38-8ccd-8ccacc969afa-0
00:17:25.600 --> 00:17:28.435
But look,
I want to just dwell on that sentence

8e891b65-cd76-4c38-8ccd-8ccacc969afa-1
00:17:28.435 --> 00:17:32.689
that you that you read there,
because there are some long sentences and

8e891b65-cd76-4c38-8ccd-8ccacc969afa-2
00:17:32.689 --> 00:17:37.416
sometimes we do critique long sentences
in stories and that is often a point of

8e891b65-cd76-4c38-8ccd-8ccacc969afa-3
00:17:37.416 --> 00:17:38.480
clarity in itself.

a02e288c-a7bd-4e60-9c5c-06a16b69d6bd-0
00:17:38.480 --> 00:17:41.880
But these are just so well constructed
and beautiful.

df1421ec-4217-422d-be4c-0239d0fd8981-0
00:17:42.480 --> 00:17:44.040
And that sentence you mentioned there?

df3f67a0-d374-4e10-a7e7-a07117b0dca4-0
00:17:44.440 --> 00:17:46.080
His hands never hesitated.

252a31f6-4793-49f1-9593-050a5cf65ae1-0
00:17:46.160 --> 00:17:49.840
Not four years ago when he took one sheet
to buy the first dress.

ce28e107-33f9-4731-996f-7576527877d1-0
00:17:49.880 --> 00:17:53.440
Not last Tuesday when he stole feathers
from Julietes locker.

607495ea-6456-4735-b182-f87eff625a15-0
00:17:53.440 --> 00:17:55.640
Familiar before anyone had asked why.

1ea0f861-0c46-4680-ad48-9052b06027c5-0
00:17:56.200 --> 00:18:00.720
I love the way that that sentence ends in
before anyone had asked why,

1ea0f861-0c46-4680-ad48-9052b06027c5-1
00:18:00.720 --> 00:18:03.840
just to give it a bit of extra kick of
intrigue.

4e750416-8599-4851-8e54-e387cc4b15cf-0
00:18:04.280 --> 00:18:07.360
And it's hard for me to explain exactly
why that appeals to me.

ae56ae29-cbb5-42de-876e-f72d6572513c-0
00:18:07.360 --> 00:18:10.775
But there's something just poetic about
the way that that's phrased that I find

ae56ae29-cbb5-42de-876e-f72d6572513c-1
00:18:10.775 --> 00:18:11.160
striking.

9ac89de7-a7c6-4756-939f-8f0bf8179c65-0
00:18:11.200 --> 00:18:13.493
I mean,
there's a lot of poetic sort of phrases

9ac89de7-a7c6-4756-939f-8f0bf8179c65-1
00:18:13.493 --> 00:18:14.640
in that very first line.

7b466ac9-1cf9-4f13-bb84-6628b6acd5e7-0
00:18:14.640 --> 00:18:17.560
All week,
1/2 has been turning himself in the sun.

03fc8d88-1c69-4e9a-902f-8a19cdaf3a48-0
00:18:17.880 --> 00:18:19.360
I just like how that's expressed.

0c6d3578-a931-4441-af51-6d11aa9a6455-0
00:18:19.600 --> 00:18:23.837
And we do find this often, I think,
with people who enter our competition who

0c6d3578-a931-4441-af51-6d11aa9a6455-1
00:18:23.837 --> 00:18:26.554
have English as a second, third,
fourth language,

0c6d3578-a931-4441-af51-6d11aa9a6455-2
00:18:26.554 --> 00:18:30.791
we get these beautiful turns of phrase
that are not the way we would normally

0c6d3578-a931-4441-af51-6d11aa9a6455-3
00:18:30.791 --> 00:18:34.159
phrase something in English,
but which feel really beautiful.

7145efa6-142c-4fce-96fc-aad6ffa9993b-0
00:18:34.440 --> 00:18:38.280
And I think sometimes it could be just
that's how it's expressed in that

7145efa6-142c-4fce-96fc-aad6ffa9993b-1
00:18:38.280 --> 00:18:40.280
language that's being translated over.

2c079f12-3065-4a71-b84a-a239a1c7478e-0
00:18:40.280 --> 00:18:44.470
And I don't know if that's the case here,
and it would make me feel more normal to

2c079f12-3065-4a71-b84a-a239a1c7478e-1
00:18:44.470 --> 00:18:47.600
say it that way in Spanish or German or
whatever it might be.

671d8aa3-3700-4c46-84e2-4182217ae7bd-0
00:18:47.960 --> 00:18:51.802
But it just comes across as, yeah,
quite lyrical and beautiful and

671d8aa3-3700-4c46-84e2-4182217ae7bd-1
00:18:51.802 --> 00:18:54.440
unexpected and very pleasing for that
reason.

153cb654-ef32-494c-a514-fb911754f501-0
00:18:54.720 --> 00:18:57.040
So, yeah,
there's quite a few lines like that.

91b45d21-e58b-42c0-98af-cea895066ae8-0
00:18:57.480 --> 00:19:02.523
Even the line her finger slows, lands,
points at the girl in the mirror like a

91b45d21-e58b-42c0-98af-cea895066ae8-1
00:19:02.523 --> 00:19:05.843
dare, you know,
these kinds of unexpected phrasing,

91b45d21-e58b-42c0-98af-cea895066ae8-2
00:19:05.843 --> 00:19:10.760
A pleasing to read and kind of, you know,
spark that little bit of interest.

e64e5996-3bc0-42b1-9b95-5e22fd7a71eb-0
00:19:10.960 --> 00:19:11.480
Absolutely.

356dea24-9c35-42ea-b3b5-c15f4aa4f6e2-0
00:19:11.800 --> 00:19:16.443
So I want to return for a moment to the
title and its meaning to the story

356dea24-9c35-42ea-b3b5-c15f4aa4f6e2-1
00:19:16.443 --> 00:19:19.601
because I do recall talking about this
with Elise,

356dea24-9c35-42ea-b3b5-c15f4aa4f6e2-2
00:19:19.601 --> 00:19:23.440
who called out some of the lines in the
story as a favourite.

9bc6cb75-131c-4863-91e8-9b815243a049-0
00:19:24.000 --> 00:19:27.440
And the title is the grammar does the
rest.

2b4f5b47-05cd-44c2-9801-5c161c166dd2-0
00:19:27.440 --> 00:19:31.945
And I think it's a really evocative title
and unique and intriguing and all of

2b4f5b47-05cd-44c2-9801-5c161c166dd2-1
00:19:31.945 --> 00:19:33.200
those kinds of things.

0fc23680-c59e-443a-aa1b-3237dadc253c-0
00:19:33.200 --> 00:19:36.816
And the fact that it does tie directly
into this story, I think,

0fc23680-c59e-443a-aa1b-3237dadc253c-1
00:19:36.816 --> 00:19:40.322
into a notable moment where we have the
use of the word Linda,

0fc23680-c59e-443a-aa1b-3237dadc253c-2
00:19:40.322 --> 00:19:41.880
which in Spanish means what?

35e755c0-4562-4935-b508-d61562566809-0
00:19:41.880 --> 00:19:42.480
Beautiful.

8c6015cf-2e14-43f5-9098-401834fd9e22-0
00:19:42.560 --> 00:19:42.840
Yeah.

ecc4787d-0156-4ae6-995e-3d20a1b863cf-0
00:19:42.840 --> 00:19:43.360
Pretty.

e36c7122-439f-4d75-9c22-9135492e4b9a-0
00:19:43.400 --> 00:19:43.840
Yeah.

8c28b54f-f9f6-4ebb-abba-10bd4841bb50-0
00:19:44.000 --> 00:19:47.280
I'm not sure I understand what it means
in this context.

24191aaa-2633-4eb4-822b-219adc0efbb5-0
00:19:47.360 --> 00:19:47.720
Yeah.

eedff136-e143-44ec-a716-dd325fff6ae7-0
00:19:47.760 --> 00:19:50.643
I mean,
Elise sort of had strong positive

eedff136-e143-44ec-a716-dd325fff6ae7-1
00:19:50.643 --> 00:19:52.360
feelings about that line.

f9152903-e29d-4a74-99b0-7394a0227840-0
00:19:52.360 --> 00:19:54.280
I didn't feel quite the same way.

1c7defe0-93d8-4509-aaf6-bce9e534c01e-0
00:19:54.280 --> 00:19:55.920
I found it a little bit confusing.

20adeebb-741f-4804-a540-4226fafc82bf-0
00:19:55.920 --> 00:19:58.560
I wasn't quite sure what I was supposed
to take from that.

56ca6bed-d825-4ff2-9f27-ddd919b890e2-0
00:19:58.560 --> 00:20:00.440
The grammar does the rest,
and this is one of those.

64872f82-3607-4358-9150-9ed20006e6e6-0
00:20:00.680 --> 00:20:05.678
Where we say like we're getting that kind
of beauty of having something almost

64872f82-3607-4358-9150-9ed20006e6e6-1
00:20:05.678 --> 00:20:07.640
translated into English for us.

18457dd6-70ac-4ae2-b7d1-07c498b29b1c-0
00:20:07.640 --> 00:20:08.880
That's a little bit different.

ce54f2a9-2065-4a6a-a953-f42704ff043d-0
00:20:09.480 --> 00:20:12.408
But from my perspective,
like a one word sentence,

ce54f2a9-2065-4a6a-a953-f42704ff043d-1
00:20:12.408 --> 00:20:16.484
which is Linda doesn't really have a lot
of grammar, you know, I mean,

ce54f2a9-2065-4a6a-a953-f42704ff043d-2
00:20:16.484 --> 00:20:17.920
it's not without grammar.

fb758a3a-1e2d-45b3-a5ea-2e6b49aeb47e-0
00:20:18.040 --> 00:20:19.400
You know, every sentence has grammar.

9489f3db-09e6-41c9-8a4d-9ddc0b7593d4-0
00:20:19.400 --> 00:20:23.240
But I didn't really understand what that
exactly meant.

5b09b214-6aec-4002-b740-687c65f3c511-0
00:20:23.240 --> 00:20:25.752
Like,
the poetry was just that one step too far

5b09b214-6aec-4002-b740-687c65f3c511-1
00:20:25.752 --> 00:20:28.160
for me to kind of connect with the
sentiment.

1f8e2e4c-4d82-4190-ad32-b4cff2fea01f-0
00:20:28.280 --> 00:20:28.480
Yeah.

2e028028-44ce-4f16-93af-8d8709607a05-0
00:20:28.720 --> 00:20:32.407
And And while it was vibey and this whole
story is a vibe,

2e028028-44ce-4f16-93af-8d8709607a05-1
00:20:32.407 --> 00:20:34.720
and so it washed over me in that way.

2738ab6f-9492-4b45-949a-1f1d1a1a5221-0
00:20:35.040 --> 00:20:37.440
When we're calling it out,
I've got question marks.

64340a4c-0f54-4ca4-bdd2-c5771746e2bc-0
00:20:37.600 --> 00:20:38.680
I'm really not clear.

bbc5aca1-29b1-4bbe-a3fb-1abcc88fb0a4-0
00:20:38.800 --> 00:20:39.040
Yeah.

be6ccd91-21fe-4c7a-a865-f29f15ec79be-0
00:20:39.040 --> 00:20:39.760
And that's what I mean.

13908bb8-5c5e-4790-a118-ad715fbe3caf-0
00:20:39.760 --> 00:20:43.920
It is very evocative and it ties into
this meaningful moment in the story.

8d79818b-7b84-41a5-b198-0d63f79b5682-0
00:20:44.120 --> 00:20:48.593
But it does leave me with a feeling of
I'm missing something that's happening

8d79818b-7b84-41a5-b198-0d63f79b5682-1
00:20:48.593 --> 00:20:48.880
here.

5b908c40-a79d-4e74-96e2-1ba0e37c8556-0
00:20:48.920 --> 00:20:51.680
That should be the key to the story.

54b7f544-da0b-47c7-a283-a47f8384591d-0
00:20:51.680 --> 00:20:52.040
Almost.

88fe3dcd-94a9-42f5-80c9-786788ed6fc1-0
00:20:52.040 --> 00:20:52.800
It's the title.

0f4156b8-61c8-4bff-92f4-955598df2712-0
00:20:52.800 --> 00:20:53.640
It's this moment.

8f24e2c6-56e5-499e-91fa-0109896629d2-0
00:20:53.920 --> 00:20:55.600
And I'm not quite sure what it means.

797ae0e6-1f01-4410-8e0e-0aea3e620357-0
00:20:55.600 --> 00:20:58.680
But it that is,
I think maybe lost in translation.

d365bb69-9e8c-469d-b481-fe984eb0bc19-0
00:20:58.720 --> 00:20:59.760
Yeah, perhaps.

46429e42-49a4-4431-826d-931c4e269a98-0
00:21:00.160 --> 00:21:02.540
And I'm sure, Saul, could, you know,
enlighten us And,

46429e42-49a4-4431-826d-931c4e269a98-1
00:21:02.540 --> 00:21:05.786
and I would encourage you to do so,
please do on social media or what have

46429e42-49a4-4431-826d-931c4e269a98-2
00:21:05.786 --> 00:21:05.960
you.

f9770628-3942-4b0a-b7a8-449a5330e8cf-0
00:21:05.960 --> 00:21:10.800
Let us know exactly what you were getting
at there because no doubt it is beautiful.

747055c7-d87a-4a30-9d17-4bb68cca1a3f-0
00:21:10.880 --> 00:21:12.840
And Elise certainly connected with it.

69f18498-dcc9-49d7-81f1-6f517597ca0f-0
00:21:12.960 --> 00:21:14.160
I'd like to connect with it too.

9393de21-1c97-4656-a184-4967b3499f81-0
00:21:14.680 --> 00:21:19.098
And the other thing I wanted to call out
as well is from Sol's message is the

9393de21-1c97-4656-a184-4967b3499f81-1
00:21:19.098 --> 00:21:22.440
process that she went through in coming
up with this idea.

f012efd0-f6b3-4199-a965-64a9bc93f586-0
00:21:22.440 --> 00:21:27.172
And she described it as embodiment and
basically spending 60 hours looking up

f012efd0-f6b3-4199-a965-64a9bc93f586-1
00:21:27.172 --> 00:21:31.965
disco moves and doing the disco moves and
just finding what came to her and as

f012efd0-f6b3-4199-a965-64a9bc93f586-2
00:21:31.965 --> 00:21:35.120
inspiration to the story,
which is a great process.

0c058a40-2a7f-48be-a62c-6ccac8709eda-0
00:21:35.120 --> 00:21:36.640
I feel like that came through.

9dc6f57c-9b91-420e-9e1c-bb7337c03a4d-0
00:21:36.640 --> 00:21:38.080
Is that kind of crazy to say?

581a54b2-a90f-4376-9c90-c65ec729cf70-0
00:21:38.080 --> 00:21:42.747
Like I feel like sometimes we get stories
where I can tell that the person writing

581a54b2-a90f-4376-9c90-c65ec729cf70-1
00:21:42.747 --> 00:21:45.840
the story was feeling that emotion when
they wrote it.

e8904e58-1400-4a07-b840-dd9f355ee7b9-0
00:21:46.240 --> 00:21:50.615
And this is a story where that I feel
like the vibe and the energy of that

e8904e58-1400-4a07-b840-dd9f355ee7b9-1
00:21:50.615 --> 00:21:54.640
dancing actually did come through in the
writing and felt very real.

90b8dc8b-f8cb-47a9-a970-18a9666f69ae-0
00:21:55.040 --> 00:21:57.560
And I think that's a really great
strategy.

eb6fd1ab-7e4b-47b5-9654-c52179319bd9-0
00:21:57.560 --> 00:22:00.711
Like if you know,
how do you take inspiration where you can

eb6fd1ab-7e4b-47b5-9654-c52179319bd9-1
00:22:00.711 --> 00:22:03.653
just sit there banging your head against
your keyboard,

eb6fd1ab-7e4b-47b5-9654-c52179319bd9-2
00:22:03.653 --> 00:22:07.120
or you can go with the art of it and just
see where it takes you.

71eb0a24-f782-48b0-83ab-d80d9ef217f1-0
00:22:07.200 --> 00:22:09.520
And I think that's a beautiful approach.

525f87d8-860a-49f9-9377-8f3ebbc7f1f7-0
00:22:09.680 --> 00:22:12.916
And you know, if nothing else,
you enjoy yourself while you're

525f87d8-860a-49f9-9377-8f3ebbc7f1f7-1
00:22:12.916 --> 00:22:14.560
struggling to come up with your.

644efd4a-4394-47bb-94ee-b894dccdf9eb-0
00:22:14.760 --> 00:22:14.920
It is.

3be882ab-e091-4938-b760-a979e87d03f4-0
00:22:14.920 --> 00:22:16.960
Well, it certainly worked in this case.

1457fb4f-5f93-41cf-8ae5-e975a46ecf5a-0
00:22:16.960 --> 00:22:19.958
But yeah, like, you know,
if you're trying to communicate something,

1457fb4f-5f93-41cf-8ae5-e975a46ecf5a-1
00:22:19.958 --> 00:22:21.480
like that's what writing is, right?

5a25fc40-2720-463d-9aa9-657b3ef433ce-0
00:22:21.480 --> 00:22:22.840
You're expressing something.

bcfa9b81-9468-4376-898f-3b132bbbbe3c-0
00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:27.906
What better way to figure out how to
express it than to feel it in your body

bcfa9b81-9468-4376-898f-3b132bbbbe3c-1
00:22:27.906 --> 00:22:32.214
and then to kind of like detail out
exactly what that feels like,

bcfa9b81-9468-4376-898f-3b132bbbbe3c-2
00:22:32.214 --> 00:22:36.000
finding a way to very clearly express
what it feels like.

fcee832f-7fd6-454a-b50f-ebed56514164-0
00:22:36.000 --> 00:22:39.360
I think that's kind of the goal, right,
of writing.

3aa4ea2e-20e2-4c20-bdb8-0aac89535ca9-0
00:22:39.600 --> 00:22:44.019
And one thing as well that I think I may
have called out as a critique somewhere

3aa4ea2e-20e2-4c20-bdb8-0aac89535ca9-1
00:22:44.019 --> 00:22:47.511
along the way of some of the stories this
round was that, well,

3aa4ea2e-20e2-4c20-bdb8-0aac89535ca9-2
00:22:47.511 --> 00:22:50.840
we didn't require you to include actual
dancing necessarily.

d6f811ca-5c30-4417-abba-7d01a6619bd8-0
00:22:50.840 --> 00:22:55.240
Could have just been the name of the the
dance move being incorporated.

efa131f7-b157-423e-8022-35c50d9e2845-0
00:22:55.240 --> 00:22:57.800
But a lot of people did go for dance
moves.

4aeef134-7c33-4bfb-bc2b-2d7023a14943-0
00:22:57.800 --> 00:23:02.055
And sometimes that resulted in the dance
move feeling a bit shoehorned into the

4aeef134-7c33-4bfb-bc2b-2d7023a14943-1
00:23:02.055 --> 00:23:06.150
story, like it was a regular story,
and then all of a sudden someone's doing

4aeef134-7c33-4bfb-bc2b-2d7023a14943-2
00:23:06.150 --> 00:23:07.640
a disco move out of nowhere.

2693e59f-afb3-4d00-acdd-62e3a4c6e57e-0
00:23:08.360 --> 00:23:10.120
This was not like that.

47c75984-f862-4a0e-b9ed-45ec683985fd-0
00:23:10.120 --> 00:23:16.781
This is a case of that move being very
natural in the story and central exactly

47c75984-f862-4a0e-b9ed-45ec683985fd-1
00:23:16.781 --> 00:23:18.280
part of the story.

aeafbd81-c75c-425e-8c7f-ae32111805e2-0
00:23:18.400 --> 00:23:19.560
It didn't come out of nowhere.

ece46a93-75eb-45fb-8b35-d2c5d7abac4c-0
00:23:19.560 --> 00:23:21.840
It was completely expected and normal.

20b3b36d-2bcd-4c79-88c8-98022d1245db-0
00:23:21.840 --> 00:23:23.840
And as you say, central to the story.

551916bb-2568-4680-a8be-adbde907ec11-0
00:23:24.520 --> 00:23:27.440
And I think that's a good strategy,
right when you're thinking about the

551916bb-2568-4680-a8be-adbde907ec11-1
00:23:27.440 --> 00:23:29.840
prompts because sometimes, like, look,
you get the prompts.

f2c1dcbc-8877-47e4-9cc6-9339b026694b-0
00:23:29.840 --> 00:23:33.636
And if you're anything like me,
your initial reaction is to rage and say,

f2c1dcbc-8877-47e4-9cc6-9339b026694b-1
00:23:33.636 --> 00:23:36.920
these are the dumbest prompts I've ever
seen in my entire life.

72c7a401-a67f-4055-aeb2-fc587362d614-0
00:23:36.920 --> 00:23:40.160
How am I expected to write a story in
response to these prompts?

9f25ad7f-1eec-4b9d-b0d4-7bae09b1ea30-0
00:23:40.720 --> 00:23:44.135
And very quickly thereafter,
if you go with it, you start to twig,

9f25ad7f-1eec-4b9d-b0d4-7bae09b1ea30-1
00:23:44.135 --> 00:23:47.448
and then you get ideas,
and then you go down a path and suddenly

9f25ad7f-1eec-4b9d-b0d4-7bae09b1ea30-2
00:23:47.448 --> 00:23:49.080
you're excited to write a story.

7fcfcace-c89b-4096-b7b3-767e80e46404-0
00:23:49.080 --> 00:23:50.760
That's how it goes for me anyway.

0807d29c-e2e5-45bc-be34-12a17d0eadf1-0
00:23:51.320 --> 00:23:55.789
And I think it can be tempting sometimes
to kind of just hide the prompt or kind

0807d29c-e2e5-45bc-be34-12a17d0eadf1-1
00:23:55.789 --> 00:23:58.880
of like brush it aside and just like,
ignore it almost.

46289ae2-a724-4f59-ad83-4005c7879952-0
00:23:59.160 --> 00:24:03.387
And while that can be appropriate, I mean,
you could certainly get away with losing

46289ae2-a724-4f59-ad83-4005c7879952-1
00:24:03.387 --> 00:24:06.760
the word St, for example,
and hiding that somewhere in your story.

997025ce-59a5-44b0-82a5-7dce1752afed-0
00:24:07.040 --> 00:24:11.355
I think it's probably a better strategy
to find a way to make each of,

997025ce-59a5-44b0-82a5-7dce1752afed-1
00:24:11.355 --> 00:24:15.974
in this case, in this competition,
3 prompts quite central and intrinsic to

997025ce-59a5-44b0-82a5-7dce1752afed-2
00:24:15.974 --> 00:24:18.831
your story in a way that if they were
removed,

997025ce-59a5-44b0-82a5-7dce1752afed-3
00:24:18.831 --> 00:24:21.080
the story would no longer make sense.

191ea35e-eca3-482e-b0f0-af7e19b0ef0d-0
00:24:21.400 --> 00:24:26.119
I don't think that's necessarily needs to
be the goal for all three prompts every

191ea35e-eca3-482e-b0f0-af7e19b0ef0d-1
00:24:26.119 --> 00:24:28.593
time,
but certainly to have a prompt being

191ea35e-eca3-482e-b0f0-af7e19b0ef0d-2
00:24:28.593 --> 00:24:31.528
intrinsic is a really excellent way to
look at it,

191ea35e-eca3-482e-b0f0-af7e19b0ef0d-3
00:24:31.528 --> 00:24:35.960
because otherwise you do run the risk of
it feeling shoehorned in or forced.

93b08e1c-8ba4-45b6-8720-a64f2d96db51-0
00:24:36.080 --> 00:24:36.400
Yeah.

c05c166f-0518-4a4c-abef-45d67ab879fa-0
00:24:36.480 --> 00:24:41.000
And yeah, in this case it really wasn't,
as a very poignant point, if you will.

866c130c-ef9b-4796-936e-00e9fae092ee-0
00:24:41.280 --> 00:24:41.920
No, I agree.

f021f228-b3a8-4b4e-b735-1577ce454abc-0
00:24:41.920 --> 00:24:46.169
And also the action prompt here,
the freaking out prompt was also part of

f021f228-b3a8-4b4e-b735-1577ce454abc-1
00:24:46.169 --> 00:24:49.040
the plot, but it wasn't,
it wasn't shoehorned in.

dd41d171-1238-49a8-845f-54705877c81a-0
00:24:49.040 --> 00:24:50.520
It was essential to the story.

a3950ddc-ff0b-4301-aaf0-0a2168d12c91-0
00:24:51.040 --> 00:24:54.265
If you receive this story not knowing
what the prompts were,

a3950ddc-ff0b-4301-aaf0-0a2168d12c91-1
00:24:54.265 --> 00:24:58.336
you would have a hard time reverse
engineering what the prompts were for the

a3950ddc-ff0b-4301-aaf0-0a2168d12c91-2
00:24:58.336 --> 00:25:00.240
story because they didn't stand out.

bafeb9f0-840f-45e0-92c5-3ae74083dc46-0
00:25:00.240 --> 00:25:03.640
They weren't visible in that way,
although just on that.

79fd8aed-d713-4d43-aaca-f855393a2650-0
00:25:03.640 --> 00:25:06.680
So we've got the word disco,
which was the word prompt in this story.

7d5608aa-204d-4f41-9dc6-eed997ecd42a-0
00:25:06.680 --> 00:25:10.360
And in fact,
Saul has put disco in all caps.

a98d1348-e089-4af9-83c8-d35bb565493b-0
00:25:10.360 --> 00:25:10.520
Yep.

f3c2cd13-463a-435a-8d07-6bb24be608ea-0
00:25:10.840 --> 00:25:15.417
And I'm not sure why that choice was made,
but you don't need to put your word in

f3c2cd13-463a-435a-8d07-6bb24be608ea-1
00:25:15.417 --> 00:25:15.920
all caps.

63d8c85e-590c-4daa-980a-c469b6c6c815-0
00:25:15.920 --> 00:25:17.520
Like we can find it without that.

9b8d6414-a641-46ff-8ee8-106e8eb5e53b-0
00:25:17.520 --> 00:25:20.914
I know, like when we release the prompts,
we put the words in all caps,

9b8d6414-a641-46ff-8ee8-106e8eb5e53b-1
00:25:20.914 --> 00:25:24.120
but that doesn't mean it has to be
presented that way in the story.

fbc26615-002f-49ff-abb9-389f694d7f1c-0
00:25:24.120 --> 00:25:25.880
And I think sometimes people do that.

b7097f19-4d46-457c-adc0-d8ca0a253d3c-0
00:25:25.880 --> 00:25:30.615
So not sure if that was an intentional
choice or if you felt that that needed to

b7097f19-4d46-457c-adc0-d8ca0a253d3c-1
00:25:30.615 --> 00:25:31.960
be done, but it didn't.

4c512797-6959-4f9d-8209-284d4ae18e49-0
00:25:31.960 --> 00:25:34.080
So just something to be mindful of.

170d49be-fc36-40d8-bd5c-9abf95ca2b1a-0
00:25:34.080 --> 00:25:37.650
But yeah, as you say,
all three prompts quite intrinsic and

170d49be-fc36-40d8-bd5c-9abf95ca2b1a-1
00:25:37.650 --> 00:25:38.960
central to this story.

2da53dd9-82f4-43d5-b7da-e338938452af-0
00:25:39.640 --> 00:25:43.680
So let's talk about the storytelling
aspect of this.

7e0aa99b-afe3-462e-b5f3-d63ab8710147-0
00:25:43.680 --> 00:25:47.226
And I guess the plots and the pay off
here as well,

7e0aa99b-afe3-462e-b5f3-d63ab8710147-1
00:25:47.226 --> 00:25:52.000
because there is a moment here that is
quite subtle and and powerful.

8ed74c1e-ba90-4d34-8486-77f0cad893af-0
00:25:52.000 --> 00:25:53.960
That is the the core of the story.

ce336e8e-be27-4f56-8664-6d0264fddd34-0
00:25:53.960 --> 00:25:57.978
And it's like a story of self
actualization in a moment of dance and

ce336e8e-be27-4f56-8664-6d0264fddd34-1
00:25:57.978 --> 00:26:00.600
becoming the thing that you've wanted to
be.

8040d9b0-83eb-4ff3-975b-0022933a95f3-0
00:26:01.120 --> 00:26:02.160
And I think it's really powerful.

1867ebe6-2b52-4e98-a6ae-87602bbec972-0
00:26:02.160 --> 00:26:06.522
And I think it's also something that's
very hard to pull off successfully in a

1867ebe6-2b52-4e98-a6ae-87602bbec972-1
00:26:06.522 --> 00:26:11.160
story because it's very internal and it's
something that happens within the soul of

1867ebe6-2b52-4e98-a6ae-87602bbec972-2
00:26:11.160 --> 00:26:12.320
the character, right?

85c08fd5-8551-4624-8121-15ac3ee7a340-0
00:26:12.320 --> 00:26:16.857
And it's very hard to make a reader
connect with that without there being

85c08fd5-8551-4624-8121-15ac3ee7a340-1
00:26:16.857 --> 00:26:19.800
considerable action in the scene to
justify it.

c176f279-b5b3-43b7-8e0e-5b8f199edfc8-0
00:26:19.800 --> 00:26:23.765
And I think soul has done a really great
job of actually giving us the action and

c176f279-b5b3-43b7-8e0e-5b8f199edfc8-1
00:26:23.765 --> 00:26:27.586
giving us all of the things that lead
into that moment that make it so special

c176f279-b5b3-43b7-8e0e-5b8f199edfc8-2
00:26:27.586 --> 00:26:28.360
and significant.

468411b5-b2cd-47e8-a568-d02c4f729105-0
00:26:28.640 --> 00:26:29.120
I think so.

bdcbefa0-f9ad-460b-899c-05075666656f-0
00:26:29.120 --> 00:26:31.720
And it's told in third person as well,
right?

6eadc24d-90f3-4731-abf8-ae236a378773-0
00:26:31.720 --> 00:26:34.160
So we're not getting those internal
thoughts as such.

8d48375e-71b1-480f-878b-080c0f4e2731-0
00:26:34.160 --> 00:26:37.670
And I think that's really artful because,
you know, we talk about show don't tell,

8d48375e-71b1-480f-878b-080c0f4e2731-1
00:26:37.670 --> 00:26:39.320
and that's exactly what this is, right?

dba6020a-b4d4-4a29-b54a-c6d179a89239-0
00:26:39.320 --> 00:26:43.170
We're not getting the internal thoughts
and yet we understand exactly what's

dba6020a-b4d4-4a29-b54a-c6d179a89239-1
00:26:43.170 --> 00:26:45.120
going on in the mind of this character.

9b01b988-d649-4b84-ad27-aeee9d47002f-0
00:26:45.440 --> 00:26:49.917
We're getting that through the narration
and through the action and how that

9b01b988-d649-4b84-ad27-aeee9d47002f-1
00:26:49.917 --> 00:26:51.080
action is described.

5bc30130-90af-4d19-bfb7-d20d8a449af2-0
00:26:51.240 --> 00:26:55.000
And I think that's really clever and I
think that's something to strive for.

a33e9efb-8fa1-4d6f-9e7b-bb77570199ce-0
00:26:55.520 --> 00:26:58.940
So you talk about this moment of self
actualization and I think it's here,

a33e9efb-8fa1-4d6f-9e7b-bb77570199ce-1
00:26:58.940 --> 00:27:00.400
It's in this line, which I love.

6ddfb1c2-ffbd-4f9f-bdfe-1bf8479bd5fa-0
00:27:00.400 --> 00:27:01.480
It's a beautiful line.

76cf9782-7e65-4f4a-9ffa-1401f90bb3e1-0
00:27:02.120 --> 00:27:05.483
A mirrored panel catches her,
enormous silvered,

76cf9782-7e65-4f4a-9ffa-1401f90bb3e1-1
00:27:05.483 --> 00:27:07.200
curved like a second sky.

4d60fab6-730f-4f44-b474-663c27026b6c-0
00:27:07.560 --> 00:27:10.000
And for the first time,
she's not Niko's Millie.

8ae66b1e-65fa-455f-b242-eb1a8573e3ac-0
00:27:10.240 --> 00:27:10.760
Not one.

1cae77e2-a0e9-46bf-9293-878cbf3b7814-0
00:27:10.760 --> 00:27:14.043
She's Millie,
but the Millie the club built this float

1cae77e2-a0e9-46bf-9293-878cbf3b7814-1
00:27:14.043 --> 00:27:18.461
to frame her finger slows, lands,
points at the girl in the mirror like a

1cae77e2-a0e9-46bf-9293-878cbf3b7814-2
00:27:18.461 --> 00:27:18.760
dare.

f9f658ae-e62a-44c7-829d-0cfa2b3c6a43-0
00:27:19.080 --> 00:27:24.306
So that moment is her coming into her own
there as like the star of the show that

f9f658ae-e62a-44c7-829d-0cfa2b3c6a43-1
00:27:24.306 --> 00:27:29.468
maybe she has always dreamt of being or
always felt that she was and is only now

f9f658ae-e62a-44c7-829d-0cfa2b3c6a43-2
00:27:29.468 --> 00:27:32.400
just getting the chance to kind of show
that.

7b23f688-f8ad-4f64-a956-7a0664b7569b-0
00:27:32.400 --> 00:27:35.800
And that's really the climax of this
story.

2def1ffc-99e0-4bf4-b481-56ee9c277287-0
00:27:36.080 --> 00:27:40.240
And then we get that sort of vibey
reaction beat after that as well.

a75adfbb-93b3-43b4-ac92-8518ee3c1d4c-0
00:27:40.240 --> 00:27:44.827
I think that works really well in terms
of making that moment resonate more fully

a75adfbb-93b3-43b4-ac92-8518ee3c1d4c-1
00:27:44.827 --> 00:27:47.960
and deeply as such a pivotal moment for
this character.

c7ee8bc4-aa01-45a3-bb9c-a5354f4ea740-0
00:27:48.520 --> 00:27:49.800
And I love those moments as well.

9f11ed61-6ebf-4afb-b355-0b018bb8ec44-0
00:27:49.800 --> 00:27:52.800
Like the way that sentence ends like a
dare.

dd34527a-2969-45d6-b8d2-41173b0a6e93-0
00:27:53.200 --> 00:27:56.520
And we as the reader, you know,
we have to unpack what that means and

dd34527a-2969-45d6-b8d2-41173b0a6e93-1
00:27:56.520 --> 00:27:59.320
what that would look like and what that
means emotionally.

c469dd69-7be5-46a2-9d60-19b8acfa4eef-0
00:27:59.320 --> 00:28:00.440
And it's very complex.

efdf0841-4a3b-477a-ae46-1a07f385b23b-0
00:28:01.120 --> 00:28:06.280
We often talk about not naming an emotion,
and I think this is what that looks like.

fa039f4d-a510-49f7-84f5-ceeb127c07b7-0
00:28:06.360 --> 00:28:11.088
This is what not naming an emotion,
letting the actions speak and also giving

fa039f4d-a510-49f7-84f5-ceeb127c07b7-1
00:28:11.088 --> 00:28:14.240
the reader something to chew on and to
contemplate.

3e20388d-568a-40e6-850f-edcc5e95658a-0
00:28:14.240 --> 00:28:15.560
What is that emotion?

2613339f-e447-40c6-92c5-24823cec309d-0
00:28:15.880 --> 00:28:16.800
This is very well done.

335ad3ca-45aa-4de1-bd10-aacabe8b88ab-0
00:28:17.400 --> 00:28:17.520
Yeah.

09287611-6df1-4aa7-a829-706a50eccfe1-0
00:28:17.520 --> 00:28:19.280
And then we, you know,
we have the next moment.

218f5ee4-e2f9-4c0e-9f1b-9c27cd597eef-0
00:28:19.280 --> 00:28:21.360
The crowd reads it as choreography.

ae15d66a-2353-4c9c-bffd-092eac336811-0
00:28:21.640 --> 00:28:24.690
And that can be really satisfying as a
reader, too,

ae15d66a-2353-4c9c-bffd-092eac336811-1
00:28:24.690 --> 00:28:28.680
Like what is happening versus what people
perceive to be happening.

f30851f8-0fd4-45b7-920f-c8a328d1d4e6-0
00:28:28.680 --> 00:28:32.440
The difference between those two things
is pretty juicy, right?

e8948189-df19-4295-8011-01a331158df9-0
00:28:32.440 --> 00:28:35.686
It's interesting,
like when there's a truth and then like a

e8948189-df19-4295-8011-01a331158df9-1
00:28:35.686 --> 00:28:40.068
misunderstanding and all of those sorts
of things that leave room for the reader

e8948189-df19-4295-8011-01a331158df9-2
00:28:40.068 --> 00:28:41.800
to kind of dwell in and imagine.

4f142fb8-43ba-4852-adb3-92e45e204930-0
00:28:41.800 --> 00:28:45.023
Like,
what does that discrepancy mean in the

4f142fb8-43ba-4852-adb3-92e45e204930-1
00:28:45.023 --> 00:28:46.600
context of this story?

79c7fe06-e064-4afa-a3f5-15f0b036458b-0
00:28:46.920 --> 00:28:50.693
There are a couple of sentences that I
suppose I would challenge though,

79c7fe06-e064-4afa-a3f5-15f0b036458b-1
00:28:50.693 --> 00:28:53.640
just in terms of how I felt when I read
those sentences.

b65ef241-07d0-4e24-8de3-4ae0388a2712-0
00:28:53.640 --> 00:28:55.896
So again,
lots of beautiful stuff and I'm just

b65ef241-07d0-4e24-8de3-4ae0388a2712-1
00:28:55.896 --> 00:28:59.496
going to go straight to the gutter
because I feel like I have to call this

b65ef241-07d0-4e24-8de3-4ae0388a2712-2
00:28:59.496 --> 00:28:59.880
one out.

5df87b93-70c4-4b25-b73a-65eb0c7112fe-0
00:28:59.880 --> 00:29:03.368
But both of us had the the same reaction
to this line,

5df87b93-70c4-4b25-b73a-65eb0c7112fe-1
00:29:03.368 --> 00:29:06.666
which was the next Carossa is coming the
other way,

5df87b93-70c4-4b25-b73a-65eb0c7112fe-2
00:29:06.666 --> 00:29:10.662
blue and gold and Nico is on it,
shoulders oiled, feathers up,

5df87b93-70c4-4b25-b73a-65eb0c7112fe-3
00:29:10.662 --> 00:29:15.800
finding her across the runway with the
same finger she has just used on herself.

c789c12d-4899-4a54-9fb8-3e076b412c5c-0
00:29:16.360 --> 00:29:21.600
Now totally in the gutter,
totally flesh fiction ruined me and so on.

fb2237f5-cc84-4924-b13e-b1d11af549ec-0
00:29:21.600 --> 00:29:24.548
Yes,
but the phrasing of that sentence the the

fb2237f5-cc84-4924-b13e-b1d11af549ec-1
00:29:24.548 --> 00:29:29.693
finger she has just used on herself has a
bit of an implication that I'm not sure

fb2237f5-cc84-4924-b13e-b1d11af549ec-2
00:29:29.693 --> 00:29:30.759
if soul intended.

dc449f8a-7e68-4d05-acfb-f2b00b034081-0
00:29:31.160 --> 00:29:35.685
And so if I was beta reading this story,
I would be challenging that line and just

dc449f8a-7e68-4d05-acfb-f2b00b034081-1
00:29:35.685 --> 00:29:38.793
being like, oh,
I'm not quite sure if you meant that and

dc449f8a-7e68-4d05-acfb-f2b00b034081-2
00:29:38.793 --> 00:29:39.720
if you did, fine.

b3780e17-1e77-41dc-a759-81b87ee3704e-0
00:29:39.760 --> 00:29:43.560
But useful to be aware that that's kind
of the reaction.

c1301845-cd4b-40f1-8ab6-a13af593d336-0
00:29:43.600 --> 00:29:46.520
It does have a sexual connotation that
you maybe didn't mean.

518bec63-5bb7-4dcb-b9a4-a9b54e3c6b17-0
00:29:46.720 --> 00:29:49.360
But I think we understand what is being
said in that.

a6a8513f-22fe-4946-a33a-67eafb004f94-0
00:29:49.360 --> 00:29:51.720
And it is a powerful moment as well.

4b5a8ac6-c973-4489-b424-a035c3bf31c4-0
00:29:52.040 --> 00:29:52.480
It is.

154556ba-cf17-47ea-a110-07fc70562920-0
00:29:52.480 --> 00:29:54.960
But you know,
you've just got to be careful to not trip

154556ba-cf17-47ea-a110-07fc70562920-1
00:29:54.960 --> 00:29:56.200
people up with those things.

033187c5-4978-4e6b-9a24-720758ff5a9a-0
00:29:56.200 --> 00:29:58.320
So always useful to be aware of.

b6df8def-3ab1-406e-849b-d9d1c6eb1b58-0
00:29:58.680 --> 00:30:02.120
And then the other line I would challenge
is that very last sentence.

29bbe957-4258-427c-b678-a940634d56de-0
00:30:02.360 --> 00:30:04.480
So we've got the crowd screams.

c7a24a91-9137-4636-b358-142d50fdbfeb-0
00:30:04.840 --> 00:30:05.800
The drums do.

935d41af-7d22-4fa9-a0b3-2f6bdfebb3f3-0
00:30:06.360 --> 00:30:09.840
Now the drums do to me is not a complete
sentence.

55092e76-b895-4cd7-b405-ea6d7a99d14e-0
00:30:10.000 --> 00:30:12.360
I'm not exactly sure what that means.

aa8ac81e-70e2-4e1c-9950-e67196d2cb47-0
00:30:12.560 --> 00:30:16.409
I'm on the fence about this sentence
because you're right,

aa8ac81e-70e2-4e1c-9950-e67196d2cb47-1
00:30:16.409 --> 00:30:19.280
it's not a grammatically complete
sentence.

ffaf90af-36ae-448a-b31f-ad9e96d232c3-0
00:30:19.840 --> 00:30:24.526
But it is in keeping with the poetic tone
of the story and the language that is

ffaf90af-36ae-448a-b31f-ad9e96d232c3-1
00:30:24.526 --> 00:30:29.153
evident throughout the story where we
have something I think makes more sense,

ffaf90af-36ae-448a-b31f-ad9e96d232c3-2
00:30:29.153 --> 00:30:32.200
maybe as stated in Spanish than it does
in English.

b2617ebb-b2c9-4a63-8513-273552289a97-0
00:30:32.480 --> 00:30:36.674
Yeah,
it's an unusual frame and I think one

b2617ebb-b2c9-4a63-8513-273552289a97-1
00:30:36.674 --> 00:30:44.015
that makes the ending all the more
ambiguous, maybe unknowable, interesting,

b2617ebb-b2c9-4a63-8513-273552289a97-2
00:30:44.015 --> 00:30:45.160
but I agree.

84bfef6e-aec9-4f86-9c6a-3f976582a114-0
00:30:45.280 --> 00:30:48.120
It also does leave you with a moment of
the drums.

65db90f5-9bfd-465b-beec-1cf4a5fd635f-0
00:30:48.120 --> 00:30:48.640
Do what?

01398a98-c78a-4601-be6e-0be11406dcf4-0
00:30:48.960 --> 00:30:49.200
Yeah.

77262c22-d623-4bb7-86c9-aded4169d4d5-0
00:30:49.520 --> 00:30:51.200
So both of those are true at once.

abb54c21-1829-4792-a6ca-471826ced8cd-0
00:30:51.200 --> 00:30:55.480
So as with the use of Spanish here,
like it's a double edged sword.

8f0beb39-9e51-432f-8b59-d863dada15d5-0
00:30:55.720 --> 00:30:56.520
It is evocative.

24671458-bd3b-4659-8a0d-469840345ea6-0
00:30:56.520 --> 00:30:59.461
It does lend so much character to the
story,

24671458-bd3b-4659-8a0d-469840345ea6-1
00:30:59.461 --> 00:31:01.880
but it's also a little bit confusing.

42863fb1-1547-484a-b565-4d2f47a3a4ef-0
00:31:02.400 --> 00:31:06.953
So I would say what I imagine Seoul's
intention was with this final line,

42863fb1-1547-484a-b565-4d2f47a3a4ef-1
00:31:06.953 --> 00:31:08.800
and I'm happy to be corrected.

34e743c5-e853-4d65-974b-206db1fdc150-0
00:31:08.800 --> 00:31:09.560
It's not my story.

8513f81e-060e-455c-8927-00275fa15965-0
00:31:09.560 --> 00:31:14.684
I'm just guessing the vibe of this final
line was meant to be like and the drums

8513f81e-060e-455c-8927-00275fa15965-1
00:31:14.684 --> 00:31:18.480
continue kind of thing and the drums play
on kind of thing.

12479eba-908e-4fbc-a5a4-6f49a339640f-0
00:31:18.800 --> 00:31:22.758
And so in English phrasing,
what I might suggest there is something

12479eba-908e-4fbc-a5a4-6f49a339640f-1
00:31:22.758 --> 00:31:27.472
more along the lines of like the drums
roll on or something like that to suggest

12479eba-908e-4fbc-a5a4-6f49a339640f-2
00:31:27.472 --> 00:31:32.245
that the drums are just playing, you know,
and that's the vibe that we're left on

12479eba-908e-4fbc-a5a4-6f49a339640f-3
00:31:32.245 --> 00:31:34.981
this,
these beating drums or the drums beat on

12479eba-908e-4fbc-a5a4-6f49a339640f-4
00:31:34.981 --> 00:31:36.320
or something like that.

3bcf0871-879b-4d73-8783-a17a97624853-0
00:31:37.040 --> 00:31:39.964
Well, I, I,
I take it as meaning the drums do scream

3bcf0871-879b-4d73-8783-a17a97624853-1
00:31:39.964 --> 00:31:41.840
as well because the crowd screams.

a4d0019b-61b1-4512-963b-d87b0387661f-0
00:31:41.960 --> 00:31:43.720
The drums do scream as well.

157f4df6-54a6-45db-9968-3a65736bbbe3-0
00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:47.380
Well, look, again,
it's just useful to be aware that that's

157f4df6-54a6-45db-9968-3a65736bbbe3-1
00:31:47.380 --> 00:31:49.240
what your reader is experiencing.

35a38920-f60a-4444-987f-beccc3e5a832-0
00:31:49.240 --> 00:31:52.273
So if you have some beta readers,
if you're in the forum and so on,

35a38920-f60a-4444-987f-beccc3e5a832-1
00:31:52.273 --> 00:31:56.020
and you're getting that kind of feedback,
then maybe that's something that needs to

35a38920-f60a-4444-987f-beccc3e5a832-2
00:31:56.020 --> 00:31:56.600
be addressed.

295a4f05-5c98-4091-86e1-d60c7691adac-0
00:31:56.600 --> 00:31:58.846
But yeah,
ultimately you're the artist and you get

295a4f05-5c98-4091-86e1-d60c7691adac-1
00:31:58.846 --> 00:32:00.960
to decide the effect you want to leave us
with.

ca24a482-a687-4502-bc7a-987ec38abd13-0
00:32:01.320 --> 00:32:06.240
I do think that what we always want to
avoid is tripping the reader up.

3bbf7c25-e7ca-42b8-8744-98a9e3e55bba-0
00:32:06.280 --> 00:32:08.492
And for me,
those couple of things that I mentioned

3bbf7c25-e7ca-42b8-8744-98a9e3e55bba-1
00:32:08.492 --> 00:32:08.960
trip me up.

3fee9048-051d-4326-a9b5-00ee60a795d8-0
00:32:09.560 --> 00:32:12.080
There are other poetic lines here that
didn't trip me up.

4c1a3165-c468-4c94-a6ca-146470707d3b-0
00:32:12.680 --> 00:32:13.840
I am just one reader.

5e9e680b-0a0c-4c0d-b36f-7837473f76b2-0
00:32:14.040 --> 00:32:17.194
But I think a good rule of thumb,
and this is just in general,

5e9e680b-0a0c-4c0d-b36f-7837473f76b2-1
00:32:17.194 --> 00:32:20.898
if you're getting feedback from people
and two people say the same thing,

5e9e680b-0a0c-4c0d-b36f-7837473f76b2-2
00:32:20.898 --> 00:32:21.800
you should listen.

8e0fa1d9-d771-4e38-bb21-0398105c76ab-0
00:32:21.800 --> 00:32:25.144
If it's just one,
absolutely take it with a grain of salt

8e0fa1d9-d771-4e38-bb21-0398105c76ab-1
00:32:25.144 --> 00:32:28.200
potentially like listen and then make
your own call.

ea8d0f70-3249-4068-8d7c-2f1cd15a77c3-0
00:32:28.200 --> 00:32:30.988
But if you're getting it back from more
than one person,

ea8d0f70-3249-4068-8d7c-2f1cd15a77c3-1
00:32:30.988 --> 00:32:34.412
then you're probably not communicating
what you wanted to communicate

ea8d0f70-3249-4068-8d7c-2f1cd15a77c3-2
00:32:34.412 --> 00:32:35.000
effectively.

3cf6f95f-9380-44f6-a5db-e18d820cb455-0
00:32:35.480 --> 00:32:38.169
And if both of us are saying that same
thing,

3cf6f95f-9380-44f6-a5db-e18d820cb455-1
00:32:38.169 --> 00:32:42.729
then I suggest it's probably a problem
that needs to be corrected in terms of

3cf6f95f-9380-44f6-a5db-e18d820cb455-2
00:32:42.729 --> 00:32:45.360
communicating what you meant to
communicate.

8d8f9c16-8f75-4d0c-b559-bbf0d496fb97-0
00:32:45.840 --> 00:32:50.880
So look, to wrap this up,
entire nice little boa around it.

0048ad9a-9d82-4325-8b36-ddefff48ccac-0
00:32:51.520 --> 00:32:52.120
Wow.

a75bb48f-c387-4ca3-a4bc-dd88c4c054b1-0
00:32:54.760 --> 00:32:57.921
I've got nothing but high praise for this
writing,

a75bb48f-c387-4ca3-a4bc-dd88c4c054b1-1
00:32:57.921 --> 00:33:01.640
for the story itself and the way this has
been constructed.

a77da596-7c48-4058-aa44-3d05c0cbe652-0
00:33:01.640 --> 00:33:07.245
I think this is very imaginative,
beautiful phrasing and some characters

a77da596-7c48-4058-aa44-3d05c0cbe652-1
00:33:07.245 --> 00:33:10.240
here as well that feel very real to me.

1eee91a4-b5b7-4830-86f6-2c62b8b0ab22-0
00:33:10.840 --> 00:33:13.160
And I think the emotional impact is there.

5b4106fd-dff4-4f52-8a56-724e39300e22-0
00:33:13.520 --> 00:33:18.107
The main thing that kept this off the
long list and even potentially further is

5b4106fd-dff4-4f52-8a56-724e39300e22-1
00:33:18.107 --> 00:33:20.000
the clarity that we've discussed.

94e285a3-118b-4130-a0c7-d304e72b6524-0
00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:20.840
Yeah, absolutely.

d015a3a7-b8fa-405a-b780-c99f5e4bef73-0
00:33:20.840 --> 00:33:23.180
Again,
it's that balance between clarity and

d015a3a7-b8fa-405a-b780-c99f5e4bef73-1
00:33:23.180 --> 00:33:25.520
poetry that we come across in flash
fiction.

cf6825cd-2682-4d7c-8cfc-050fe76ddb5c-0
00:33:25.520 --> 00:33:28.855
But also, like,
there's nothing wrong with needing to put

cf6825cd-2682-4d7c-8cfc-050fe76ddb5c-1
00:33:28.855 --> 00:33:31.960
a little bit more effort into reading a
story, right?

91052cf4-5d5d-476c-b114-c288b3185042-0
00:33:31.960 --> 00:33:34.867
That can be a really satisfying
experience and I,

91052cf4-5d5d-476c-b114-c288b3185042-1
00:33:34.867 --> 00:33:39.171
I guess I don't want to give off the
impression that all we want is to be

91052cf4-5d5d-476c-b114-c288b3185042-2
00:33:39.171 --> 00:33:40.160
spoon fed, right.

d9517712-40ea-4aae-86ac-2875ffa0bfd6-0
00:33:40.160 --> 00:33:42.360
That's that's absolutely not what I'm
saying.

86737d40-353d-4342-a468-bb317cacac97-0
00:33:42.360 --> 00:33:46.600
I do think in a competition setting,
you always have the challenge that judges

86737d40-353d-4342-a468-bb317cacac97-1
00:33:46.600 --> 00:33:51.001
are reading quickly that you kind of do
need to drop someone into a scene and get

86737d40-353d-4342-a468-bb317cacac97-2
00:33:51.001 --> 00:33:54.865
them like connected with your story in a
way that perhaps in a lip mag,

86737d40-353d-4342-a468-bb317cacac97-3
00:33:54.865 --> 00:33:58.569
you might have a little bit more freedom
on, you know, in a lip mag,

86737d40-353d-4342-a468-bb317cacac97-4
00:33:58.569 --> 00:34:01.360
maybe you've got a picture to accompany
your story.

d6986271-fcb2-4e90-ae14-fa527bce245e-0
00:34:01.360 --> 00:34:05.458
Maybe there's a theme to that lip mag
that's sort of where already in the right

d6986271-fcb2-4e90-ae14-fa527bce245e-1
00:34:05.458 --> 00:34:09.556
frame of mind or there's a little bit
more context around it when we're reading

d6986271-fcb2-4e90-ae14-fa527bce245e-2
00:34:09.556 --> 00:34:13.501
it without even the name of the author
and it's just coming out of the clear

d6986271-fcb2-4e90-ae14-fa527bce245e-3
00:34:13.501 --> 00:34:14.679
blue sky kind of thing.

9ee4435b-3845-40be-be4d-f9cb231c4c26-0
00:34:15.000 --> 00:34:20.103
Then I would say we do need to err a
little bit more on the side of clarity

9ee4435b-3845-40be-be4d-f9cb231c4c26-1
00:34:20.103 --> 00:34:22.320
then perhaps you would elsewhere.

cdbc6872-c82f-4021-85fe-5251fbf96c79-0
00:34:22.320 --> 00:34:26.513
But if we talk about what takes a story
from long list to shortlist,

cdbc6872-c82f-4021-85fe-5251fbf96c79-1
00:34:26.513 --> 00:34:31.497
sometimes it is those moments of like not
knowing and not being fully sure what a

cdbc6872-c82f-4021-85fe-5251fbf96c79-2
00:34:31.497 --> 00:34:36.542
story is about and being able to kind of
put your own interpretation on it and all

cdbc6872-c82f-4021-85fe-5251fbf96c79-3
00:34:36.542 --> 00:34:37.880
of that sort of stuff.

8bb52148-255e-4ae8-bb21-77fd34e7341f-0
00:34:37.880 --> 00:34:39.680
That feels very, very satisfying.

9aac3fdd-dc51-471a-81de-8e28ff216c9c-0
00:34:40.160 --> 00:34:42.450
So there's definitely a balance to be
struck there,

9aac3fdd-dc51-471a-81de-8e28ff216c9c-1
00:34:42.450 --> 00:34:44.520
and I don't think there's one way of
doing it.

4dacbd5d-ed9f-47fc-a4f4-881f3e11f977-0
00:34:44.600 --> 00:34:47.556
Yeah,
I think it comes down to getting some

4dacbd5d-ed9f-47fc-a4f4-881f3e11f977-1
00:34:47.556 --> 00:34:52.395
beta reading help on your story to
identify any clarity issues that are

4dacbd5d-ed9f-47fc-a4f4-881f3e11f977-2
00:34:52.395 --> 00:34:56.360
creating stumbling blocks as opposed to
creating intrigue.

ab9c2239-9d6e-42a9-9dd9-973e5ae3d05f-0
00:34:56.880 --> 00:35:01.329
The ones that are creating stumbling
blocks where people feel like it's taken

ab9c2239-9d6e-42a9-9dd9-973e5ae3d05f-1
00:35:01.329 --> 00:35:04.980
them out of the story instead of perhaps
taking them deeper in,

ab9c2239-9d6e-42a9-9dd9-973e5ae3d05f-2
00:35:04.980 --> 00:35:07.889
those are the ones that need attention to
correct,

ab9c2239-9d6e-42a9-9dd9-973e5ae3d05f-3
00:35:07.889 --> 00:35:10.000
I guess before you submit your story.

ba728f13-881c-4252-b746-00f8cd369ee7-0
00:35:10.000 --> 00:35:12.480
But I agree with you completely.

877f41a6-bf30-4795-bcab-32e58caf58d4-0
00:35:12.480 --> 00:35:15.440
Absolutely believe the vibes were on with
this story.

46ab4d3d-9843-41c8-835f-17f6060d1da6-0
00:35:15.440 --> 00:35:16.600
It was very vibey.

27502bc3-ad91-4d1b-8012-375e95164916-0
00:35:16.600 --> 00:35:22.720
The characters were interesting, rich,
the emotional aspect was there.

32acac07-4697-479c-bf76-0e56d761df2c-0
00:35:22.720 --> 00:35:27.840
You could feel that kind of gritty sort
of aspect to it.

d551488b-60d9-40d8-ac0f-c0ea7ab36254-0
00:35:27.840 --> 00:35:32.800
And and this moment of, as you say,
self actualization is quite powerful.

82621cdc-4205-4955-b73f-e95f64229e38-0
00:35:32.800 --> 00:35:35.061
And, you know,
we talk sometimes about you don't always

82621cdc-4205-4955-b73f-e95f64229e38-1
00:35:35.061 --> 00:35:37.000
need a car chase and all of that sort of
stuff.

ca820e1c-8103-4bac-a7f5-71d80e739d75-0
00:35:37.000 --> 00:35:41.360
It's a quiet story in that way,
but nevertheless powerful.

d6f67d03-b802-413c-8f53-69d5a8ada1cb-0
00:35:41.360 --> 00:35:44.680
So absolutely,
so many boxes being ticked here.

bb1a4dc5-9def-4dd7-b223-3180b4d49ba6-0
00:35:44.680 --> 00:35:47.920
It was one that was quite close to the
long list.

8e61d321-d8a6-4c17-8892-063a7c82a465-0
00:35:48.360 --> 00:35:50.951
So yeah,
I'm not sure if that's a good thing to

8e61d321-d8a6-4c17-8892-063a7c82a465-1
00:35:50.951 --> 00:35:53.920
hear or a bad thing, you know,
frustrating, I suppose.

f6fc1f91-6ac3-4097-b6c4-b032eb5b2e3f-0
00:35:53.920 --> 00:35:58.983
But it just goes to show that you're not
far off like from our perspective when we

f6fc1f91-6ac3-4097-b6c4-b032eb5b2e3f-1
00:35:58.983 --> 00:35:59.960
read this story.

520367b0-fb38-4b90-8aa4-e359d7a33634-0
00:36:00.120 --> 00:36:04.546
And I would encourage you to bring your
own culture into this and the things that

520367b0-fb38-4b90-8aa4-e359d7a33634-1
00:36:04.546 --> 00:36:08.920
interest you and your history and all of
that, because that's uniquely your own.

8cea1d34-d8b9-4561-bce5-f4712bc8963f-0
00:36:09.400 --> 00:36:13.360
And that can be really rewarding and
interesting to read about.

65bcf602-74b6-4927-969f-1d11408e2d1e-0
00:36:13.360 --> 00:36:18.177
So I hope that you do continue to bring
your Spanish influence in and your

65bcf602-74b6-4927-969f-1d11408e2d1e-1
00:36:18.177 --> 00:36:22.610
Argentinian heritage into your
storytelling and perhaps just finding

65bcf602-74b6-4927-969f-1d11408e2d1e-2
00:36:22.610 --> 00:36:26.400
that balance to help us appreciate and
understand as well.

afa2ac78-e527-43c2-b607-7ee167e9b8af-0
00:36:26.480 --> 00:36:27.160
Absolutely.

80639a51-6a89-4dc9-992f-cf4bae1a1725-0
00:36:27.720 --> 00:36:29.440
And you can definitely write,
that's for sure.

aae99a9f-6e87-4551-bea3-4358859ea4b8-0
00:36:29.440 --> 00:36:32.040
Your talent is shining through in this
story.

cd657d4b-ef14-407e-9163-2e51b3f19dc0-0
00:36:32.040 --> 00:36:34.080
So we hope you do write for us again.

9f8a90c3-8100-4f65-8755-16489911d3fa-0
00:36:34.080 --> 00:36:38.361
And we hope we have answered some of your
questions as well, Sol,

9f8a90c3-8100-4f65-8755-16489911d3fa-1
00:36:38.361 --> 00:36:41.800
and this experience hasn't been too
painful for you.

abb35aaf-a4a1-4a29-8988-cf7014b38f4e-0
00:36:41.800 --> 00:36:46.390
Do you think maybe she's screaming,
crying, throwing up in the maybe stage,

abb35aaf-a4a1-4a29-8988-cf7014b38f4e-1
00:36:46.390 --> 00:36:47.840
freaking out as it were?

810a89dc-09be-48ed-b5eb-41fa7c20fa67-0
00:36:49.160 --> 00:36:54.920
But that about wraps it up for our April
Daredevils and our April Round.

26da2a7b-1ec3-47b9-a3b3-eb3cbfa32fca-0
00:36:55.440 --> 00:36:57.120
Maybe just a couple of reminders.

1d395ee6-01fe-467d-b54b-3782e926a386-0
00:36:57.160 --> 00:36:59.960
Our July round tickets are on sale.

6441e472-7e27-4e30-8bc7-a3c0019e4364-0
00:36:59.960 --> 00:37:02.846
We have revealed our theme for the July
round,

6441e472-7e27-4e30-8bc7-a3c0019e4364-1
00:37:02.846 --> 00:37:07.636
so you should have received an email or
follow us on social media to see what

6441e472-7e27-4e30-8bc7-a3c0019e4364-2
00:37:07.636 --> 00:37:08.680
that's all about.

98f3d289-0e67-4b10-bef7-e439e9d56087-0
00:37:08.680 --> 00:37:10.400
Giving you a little bit of a sneak peek.

dc679b56-2f7f-4fbf-8925-03bd8f94ca95-0
00:37:10.400 --> 00:37:12.440
This round couldn't help it.

47ba7b9d-4aca-4694-85de-ff9ca5c628e1-0
00:37:12.440 --> 00:37:14.120
It's very beautiful, the artwork.

ab96ea90-3e28-4fe7-852d-21ce34cc88d6-0
00:37:14.720 --> 00:37:19.420
So we have our artist in residence, Nora,
who has drawn our artworks this year and

ab96ea90-3e28-4fe7-852d-21ce34cc88d6-1
00:37:19.420 --> 00:37:21.120
this one, it's just so pretty.

679e27c4-5ea9-47b5-b627-070fe64b2a45-0
00:37:21.400 --> 00:37:23.040
It's colourful, very vibrant.

9adb14b1-3765-439e-a7ca-d6094bf5b36a-0
00:37:23.160 --> 00:37:26.293
So yeah,
take a look at that image and and maybe

9adb14b1-3765-439e-a7ca-d6094bf5b36a-1
00:37:26.293 --> 00:37:31.217
take a leaf out of Seoul's book and
embody that theme with a few weeks to go

9adb14b1-3765-439e-a7ca-d6094bf5b36a-2
00:37:31.217 --> 00:37:32.559
until our next round.

2938df9b-7ec7-429d-91fc-c0d9bc17c260-0
00:37:32.760 --> 00:37:36.400
And if you're not signed up,
head over to Not Quite Right prize.com.

21f8181c-ce5c-4e70-a9bb-f62971cd7650-0
00:37:36.400 --> 00:37:37.320
Get yourself a ticket.

a710efec-0276-4eb3-a7ca-5d05e3142197-0
00:37:37.400 --> 00:37:39.680
It's shaping up to be a great round.

f9ab38ae-63dc-4ba9-a0f8-bf86b41ef5c9-0
00:37:40.160 --> 00:37:40.720
I can't wait.

d1956c8e-92ee-4ec9-a670-6979c80ab12f-0
00:37:40.880 --> 00:37:45.480
And also a reminder that Flesh Fiction
Volume 1 is now out.

36cecf05-898f-45dd-b9f2-814d15c5d91e-0
00:37:45.480 --> 00:37:49.532
So if you've been waiting for the chance
to read some of those spicy flesh fiction

36cecf05-898f-45dd-b9f2-814d15c5d91e-1
00:37:49.532 --> 00:37:53.194
stories for yourself now as your chance,
head over to the website and pick

36cecf05-898f-45dd-b9f2-814d15c5d91e-2
00:37:53.194 --> 00:37:55.440
yourself up a copy of Flesh Fiction
Volume 1.

a2a30dd3-5b7b-483e-87e5-6aa37332b10f-0
00:37:56.240 --> 00:37:59.840
And lastly, just to mention,
we got Amanda, you got some workshops.

95b52b5c-a236-4416-954f-4bbea99010a1-0
00:38:00.120 --> 00:38:01.160
Tell us about your workshops.

a9032986-5c39-41e0-9a50-ae841b656cb1-0
00:38:01.160 --> 00:38:02.720
I've been having a great time so far.

91c40966-9e99-4c88-be65-a301f0d80f4a-0
00:38:02.720 --> 00:38:07.145
I've just come back from Melbourne as of
the time of recording and I meant you're

91c40966-9e99-4c88-be65-a301f0d80f4a-1
00:38:07.145 --> 00:38:09.520
not quite right as there,
which was lovely.

f3f8b36e-5563-4b5d-8bc4-5613a84f6154-0
00:38:09.560 --> 00:38:13.560
And Chloe again came along,
a really lovely group of people and a lot

f3f8b36e-5563-4b5d-8bc4-5613a84f6154-1
00:38:13.560 --> 00:38:14.360
of enthusiasm.

73dded3b-f5a7-42c0-9397-655e9da7af50-0
00:38:14.360 --> 00:38:17.680
And I know several of them will be
entering the July round.

b8f12b44-6311-4e9e-828b-74dee7528997-0
00:38:17.680 --> 00:38:21.608
So it's great to have some fresh meat and
I hope they have been listening back to

b8f12b44-6311-4e9e-828b-74dee7528997-1
00:38:21.608 --> 00:38:25.200
these Daredevil episodes to get some
hints and tips about what we might be

b8f12b44-6311-4e9e-828b-74dee7528997-2
00:38:25.200 --> 00:38:25.680
expecting.

2fdb295a-659b-4a3c-94c2-c7242f55c7a8-0
00:38:26.200 --> 00:38:29.130
But yeah,
I've got some more workshops coming up on

2fdb295a-659b-4a3c-94c2-c7242f55c7a8-1
00:38:29.130 --> 00:38:32.680
the Central Coast and in Sydney and in
Port Stephens actually.

c54b8f9c-55a6-451d-ba36-d1cbd9c929b2-0
00:38:32.680 --> 00:38:34.560
So a few different things going on.

11f815c5-4e47-4018-8222-2c0bb78c3f0c-0
00:38:34.560 --> 00:38:37.509
If you go to the What's On section of our
website,

11f815c5-4e47-4018-8222-2c0bb78c3f0c-1
00:38:37.509 --> 00:38:42.019
or in fact if you go on to Instagram,
there's a little summary there of where

11f815c5-4e47-4018-8222-2c0bb78c3f0c-2
00:38:42.019 --> 00:38:45.257
I'll be and when,
and I'd love to meet some more of our

11f815c5-4e47-4018-8222-2c0bb78c3f0c-3
00:38:45.257 --> 00:38:45.720
writers.

71a071e5-2b1b-4ea1-aabc-23a1717ec662-0
00:38:46.280 --> 00:38:47.360
Yeah, it's always good fun.

4690e04d-d0da-4ade-aa61-e9465085c7e7-0
00:38:47.360 --> 00:38:50.600
We just basically talk flash fiction for
a couple of hours or more.

fa5a6d17-090d-41ce-b606-b2f3e9305811-0
00:38:50.960 --> 00:38:56.276
I'm really in particular looking forward
to the workshop I'm doing on behalf of

fa5a6d17-090d-41ce-b606-b2f3e9305811-1
00:38:56.276 --> 00:39:01.791
Writing NSW, which is actually a full day,
full day of flash fiction, which, yeah,

fa5a6d17-090d-41ce-b606-b2f3e9305811-2
00:39:01.791 --> 00:39:03.320
is very, very exciting.

3e772b1f-6351-45ce-b071-265fe7896320-0
00:39:03.320 --> 00:39:08.628
And so plenty of time to actually write
and produce and perhaps edit a piece of

3e772b1f-6351-45ce-b071-265fe7896320-1
00:39:08.628 --> 00:39:08.960
work.

ef0b4314-e061-4971-b4e7-16d0d11170da-0
00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:11.045
And yeah,
I'm hoping to see some friendly faces

ef0b4314-e061-4971-b4e7-16d0d11170da-1
00:39:11.045 --> 00:39:11.480
there too.

210b6a0b-064b-41fd-9232-95b089149949-0
00:39:11.640 --> 00:39:16.078
So do go to notquiteright.
com and check out our events page there

210b6a0b-064b-41fd-9232-95b089149949-1
00:39:16.078 --> 00:39:18.000
to find out all of the dates.

e9b5438e-10e2-4790-b362-e540241a0771-0
00:39:18.760 --> 00:39:22.560
And the other thing that we have is our
interviews from Words on the Waves.

f8a7cdca-d948-475b-b5b3-acc2de9ddc5d-0
00:39:22.560 --> 00:39:26.440
They will now be coming out on our second
podcast stream.

d80ec354-23da-4bd2-9e40-cf40364e4ced-0
00:39:26.440 --> 00:39:28.040
Not quite right interviews.

ac1da368-eea0-437b-bd37-729df2d9a049-0
00:39:28.040 --> 00:39:31.920
Just go over to the website to find that
we interviewed 12 authors.

49e09574-7380-42a0-861b-0687c454745d-0
00:39:31.920 --> 00:39:34.280
I believe it was at Words on the Waves
this year.

fa3fa24f-5ef3-42eb-b420-76c3261a0246-0
00:39:34.280 --> 00:39:36.880
So those interviews will be up on that
podcast stream.

33f74a6f-61b4-45dd-b05a-005ae71b33bd-0
00:39:37.240 --> 00:39:38.440
Yeah, we had some great chats.

80ed06c0-993a-4135-aaad-06b2f7d15a4e-0
00:39:38.440 --> 00:39:41.480
It's always really fascinating at A at a
writers festival.

26faa0c1-68ba-4759-89fb-9d6566132dac-0
00:39:41.480 --> 00:39:45.020
You're getting people to just basically
talk about something they've been

26faa0c1-68ba-4759-89fb-9d6566132dac-1
00:39:45.020 --> 00:39:48.560
obsessed with long enough and hard enough
to write a whole book about it.

adcbaecc-80dc-40fa-bf0e-4deeccb2df27-0
00:39:49.400 --> 00:39:54.120
So you always get such a wonderful
diversity of subjects, and we did.

f0acb2ad-bc40-4a9a-a239-c2152620905d-0
00:39:54.120 --> 00:39:56.506
So, yeah,
it's fun to relive those moments from the

f0acb2ad-bc40-4a9a-a239-c2152620905d-1
00:39:56.506 --> 00:39:56.920
festival.

75f13207-720b-4804-985a-f12d6b424635-0
00:39:58.000 --> 00:40:00.720
But that about wraps it up for the April
round.

a9ce0871-8eb0-40c6-9c07-1f9d85ebe405-0
00:40:00.800 --> 00:40:04.792
We do have a regular episode coming out,
and I'm hoping, sure,

a9ce0871-8eb0-40c6-9c07-1f9d85ebe405-1
00:40:04.792 --> 00:40:09.800
because we recorded it some time ago,
but my editing backlog, it's backing up.

7e80fdeb-d02c-41cf-9c09-1915526298cc-0
00:40:10.000 --> 00:40:12.998
There's a lot,
but I do plan on releasing that before we

7e80fdeb-d02c-41cf-9c09-1915526298cc-1
00:40:12.998 --> 00:40:15.840
get underway with the July round,
if I can manage it.

84e09ec6-5340-468c-b616-5465e014c79e-0
00:40:16.480 --> 00:40:18.360
So hopefully they'll be hitting the
airwaves.

b4fcccc7-b748-4dfb-8d33-fc56a68696c0-0
00:40:18.360 --> 00:40:18.640
Very.

d1ce4866-aef4-4416-9bcf-0122dff924a0-0
00:40:18.760 --> 00:40:21.828
Soon,
and we'll be talking about my best friend

d1ce4866-aef4-4416-9bcf-0122dff924a0-1
00:40:21.828 --> 00:40:24.960
Your Bestie,
so expect that to drop fairly soon.

efee3909-5048-4d7c-80a5-042cbcc49d12-0
00:40:25.360 --> 00:40:28.760
But until then, right on, right on.

7e90bb73-174f-4cd5-bf4e-225b785c48d6-0
00:40:31.120 --> 00:40:34.480
We hope you enjoyed this special
Daredevil episode of Not Quite Right.

b92a3de6-fb06-4fc8-80fb-b5995a61ea45-0
00:40:34.840 --> 00:40:38.692
If you have thoughts on this story,
follow us on social media and join the

b92a3de6-fb06-4fc8-80fb-b5995a61ea45-1
00:40:38.692 --> 00:40:39.360
conversation.

d387d5b3-a70a-49b2-acba-ecb949c4dc86-0
00:40:39.680 --> 00:40:43.449
And if you'd like to participate in the
next round of the competition,

d387d5b3-a70a-49b2-acba-ecb949c4dc86-1
00:40:43.449 --> 00:40:45.680
head over to ourwebsite@notquiteright.com.

428bc144-691c-4550-bf11-bc9912b467d2-0
00:40:45.960 --> 00:40:52.600
That's WRITE something doesn't seem quite
right.